87 Comments

  1. Pattie C
    March 7, 2019 @ 12:09 pm

    I was also inspired by the Netflix show and went so far as to sort my sock drawer. I did the folding thing an it still looks good and all the socks have mates but that’s pretty much all I did. I have intentions of doing the linen closet but it scares me and I had a shit February, my sister died suddenly and then my cat died the next of week of god knows what so, well done you.

    Reply

    • Carrie
      March 7, 2019 @ 2:44 pm

      I am so sorry for your losses!

      Reply

  2. Graham
    March 7, 2019 @ 12:10 pm

    Remember “Hello, Ball”?

    Reply

    • Elise
      March 8, 2019 @ 12:04 pm

      HA! My husband and I use this line all the time. “Address the ball…”

      Reply

  3. Barb Mühl Comstock
    March 7, 2019 @ 12:21 pm

    Ten years ago my older brother and sister took a day from their busy lives to help me move my “stuff” from storage from one state to where I am currently living. We had a rental truck, so we couldn’t save anything more than what fit into the truck. The problem is I still miss some of the antiques I took across the street to an auction house (and got no money from their sale – the crooks!) If you are doing something like this in your life… reducing a household, or an estate sale, relative or not, of just reducing your current material goods… don’t give away what you love, and if you can, take your time to get it done right.

    Reply

  4. Melanie Vagnini
    March 7, 2019 @ 12:27 pm

    I enjoyed the Netflix series and I could see how it would be helpful, but I couldn’t get behind the idea of pulling out all your clothes or all your books at once. For me, it would add stress to have a mound of things that could take many hours to deal with. We have thousands of books, too. It would be ridiculous. But I like certain things about her method, like using sparking joy as a decision-maker on whether or not to keep something, and thinking about whether a thing should be part of your life moving forward.

    For an additional take on things, I recommend Dana K. White’s “How to Manage Your Home without Losing Your Mind” and “Decluttering at the Speed of Life: Winning Your Never-Ending Battle with Stuff.” Her method focuses on NOT making a huge mess while you’re decluttering (because you generally get interrupted and then you’ve got a pile of stuff waiting to be dealt with) and also keeping only what fits in the space you have for it. Those books are slowly changing my brain (and my house).

    A few people thought you’d miss your things. It’s been really rare when I’ve decided to get rid of something that I later want it back. I’m not sure it’s actually happened.

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  5. Joy Clark
    March 7, 2019 @ 12:33 pm

    I WANT those disco balls

    Reply

    • Mary C
      March 7, 2019 @ 12:37 pm

      Me too! I’ve always wanted a disco ball, but couldn’t justify buying it. I have it on my Christmas list every year and so far, no one else has bought it either.

      Reply

      • Marianne in Mo.
        March 7, 2019 @ 1:37 pm

        I THOUGHT I wanted them the first time I saw them, hanging on the porch at Christmas. I said to self “must get disco balls to hang in my windows at Christmas!” But now I’m over it, realizing I have probably eight big totes full of Christmas stuff, and for the last two years I’ve only opened and used two, plus the box of outdoor lights. If anyone is interested in some Crate and Barrel Sailboat ornaments, circa 2001 or thereabouts, I have a dozen! And also some delicate blown glass frosted ornaments with painted poinsettias from late ’80’s, maybe 20-30 in various sizes???
        Also, sorry, but I’m a folder. I hate to iron, so folding/hanging allows the ironing board to collect dust in the closet. Clutter of mine mostly went away when our house sold quick, we needed to be out in 30 days, and had to move into a temporary apartment while we built our dream home on a lake. I wasn’t about to move stuff three times in a year to find out I didn’t want it anymore! And most of our stuff had to go in storage in daughters’ basement, while they were in the process of finishing it as living spaces. But I still need to purge things we’ve moved and not touched in three years!

        Reply

  6. lizbeth
    March 7, 2019 @ 1:14 pm

    I just came here to support the Alpahville version over the Rod Stewart version (trash). 🙂

    Reply

  7. Barbara H.
    March 7, 2019 @ 1:16 pm

    I haven’t read the book but I watched the Netflix series and liked it a lot. She was so respectful and gentle. I liked the “sparks joy” concept and it’s been helpful. I also like the idea of will this help me in the future. The most amazing thing that has happened is that I have become a folder. I had no intention of doing the folding but for some reason the first time I was going to fold T-shirts the old way it was like she took over my body and I did it her way. I liked the results, tidier and easier to see what I have, and have continued. I need to tackle books. The hard part will be actually getting them out of the house – I think the decision making process will be easier now than in the past.

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  8. Sarah
    March 7, 2019 @ 1:43 pm

    YES! Yesterday I dove back into our basement with the intention that I’m finally going to finish the decluttering process that I started a year ago. We have gotten rid of TRUCKLOADS of stuff and there’s still more to do- as I go it gets harder because the items are more sentimental. I will tell you this. I have never regretted any of the items I passed along, not once. You go girl!

    Reply

  9. Lauren Z
    March 7, 2019 @ 1:57 pm

    So many comments! So much love and hate for Kondo!

    I just wanted to “throw out” (see what I did there?) to everyone following that there is this nifty thing called THE BUY NOTHING PROJECT. Google it! We have a robust, thriving one in Seattle (where I’m formerly from) and I miss it dearly. It’s a FB group on which you can give away and/or ask for things FOR FREE. Need a cup of sugar… or want to get rid of a boat? Go to your local BN group. I have seen the WILDEST things given away and asked for. And all (for the most part) without drama or greed involved.

    What bothers me most about this Kondo-ing movement is the vocabulary around it. (And by the way, lest this come off as holier-than-thou, let me introduce myself: Hi, my name is Lauren, and I collect/collected vintage typewriters, and LOTS of other stuff. )

    I would advocate that we start getting better as a group about finding places to put our stuff that’s not the “trash”. I suspect not a lot of us are actually filling landfill with our stuff, but just in case we are: please consider Goodwill, Buy Nothing, Craigslist Free Stuff, and charities, and asking your neighbors. No, not every one will take every thing (which is maddening. I’m looking at you, Goodwill) but it’s a good start. Even beat up clothing can actually be recycled if you put it in the right place.

    What I long for are warehouses donated by local municipalities where we can ALL put our unwanted stuff and where ALL of us can go “shopping” FOR FREE for “new” stuff. We have SO. MANY. THINGS in this country. And that’s only half the problem. The other half is: NOT ENOUGH GOOD PLACES to put used stuff. NO ONE should have to hold on to things (as I have) because they’re afraid of clogging the landfill. Young families, immigrants starting out, the poor, the elderly, and even us middle-class mamas… there is ALWAYS someone who could use your stuff. You never know until you inquire. And as a society, surely we can come up with better ways to dispose of our stuff.

    Oh, and for the record, I would take even ONE of your gorgeous cake plates, Victoria. I actually DO serve cake at my house! Good luck, everyone, with your cleanouts!

    Reply

    • Tonia
      March 7, 2019 @ 5:29 pm

      Thank you. I read the book years ago. I didn’t get through all the steps, but I adore the folding technique and still use it. I also got rid of a lot of clothes and books before losing steam. My biggest gripe since the Netflix series is people using the terms toss or trash for what they remove from their home. Obviously there will be some trash, but I think it’s important that people rid themselves of items as responsibly as possible and make it clear to others they they are actually donating, giving away, etc still useful items and not sending them to the landfill. I started focusing on reducing my personal waste last year and have found it really goes hand in hand with Konmari. I am thoughtful about where I donate items and notice I buy less things because I stop to ask myself will this bring me joy in my future or will there just be joy in acquiring it. I’ve also pulled out some things that do bring me joy and found ways to display them so they aren’t packed away in boxes.

      Reply

  10. Patricia
    March 7, 2019 @ 2:20 pm

    No disco balls? Who are you and what have you done with the Real Victoria? We moved from a two story Tudor with full basement into a two bedroom condo with a tiny storage locker in the basement. I’d been slowly working through the house for a sometime way in the future move only to have my husband urgently need to move RIGHT NOW! Speeded thru the rest of the house in one and a half months. Seven trips to consignment stores, five trips to a vintage store, bags of clothing passed along to family and friends and the rest to Goodwill, I still had a boat load of clothing to unpack into my much smaller closet.
    I’ve missed almost nothing. And now use my vintage blue willow china I’d collected for years as my everyday china.
    PS I don’t fold my clothes like Marie either.

    Reply

  11. Sophie Carrera
    March 7, 2019 @ 2:24 pm

    I’m not sure if it’s you or me but I can’t get through your posts any more. There are too many useless words and I can’t follow your point(s), if in fact any points exist. Sometimes I will read a sentence three times before I give up. It’s like you peaked with the kingdom mirror, which was hilariously brilliant, but have never been as interesting since then.
    … and the long comments from all your wanna-be-blogger fans.. so desperate to be heard and be compared to you. This has been a long time coming and I’m kind of sad but I’m breaking up with you and your silly cronies forever. ***Commence bashing from said cronies***

    Reply

    • fiverx313
      March 7, 2019 @ 2:58 pm

      wow

      Reply

    • Ann
      March 7, 2019 @ 3:20 pm

      I disagree so fully I’m stuttering for words. What really confuses me is your need to be mean. Why not just leave the blog, quietly, silently, and with a shed of personal dignity? What need of yours was met by your comment?

      (Victoria, I think you make your words do remarkable work; I love that about your blog.)

      Reply

      • Ren Hoek
        March 8, 2019 @ 1:58 pm

        Its the need of the narcissist. Entitled and attention seeking, with a dash of belittling. Look at me! I’ve been reading your blog anonymously, like hundreds of others, but unlike ‘those’ people, I won’t simply stop reading. I’m going to go out of my way to post a comment so you KNOW I’m leaving and how you’ve displeased me. I’ll also suggest that others will argue with me, so that if and when they do, I can claim persecution for simply expressing my own opinions.

        I’m willing to bet 100% of the ‘cronies’ don’t give a rats ass.

        Reply

    • judy
      March 7, 2019 @ 10:07 pm

      Dear person, I do believe you stumbled in from that darling bit of geography that Sarah can see from her house or you bumped into the stupid pole cause nothing you said makes any sense at all. You are being quite sensible in one thing though, never hang with people you don’t like and they probably won’t miss you one bit- if they ever noticed you at all. On the stripping one’s life to its bare bones and reveling in “the present moment” yuck! I’m 78 and read only from a nook and a kindle but I still have 10 6′ x 3′ bookcases filled with books and loaded with 59 years of marriage and things I find a feast for the eyes of ones soul. From the glorious excess of the Victorian Age to the grey/white spotless emptiness of some of today’s abodes- seems a rejection of herculean proportions. Wonder why?

      Reply

    • Erin
      March 8, 2019 @ 11:05 am

      Hi Sophie,

      You are entitled to your opinion, matters of taste are highly personal, but your farewell lacks grace and empathy. Even if you believe what you said to be true, are your comments kind or useful? Telling a person they have peaked is not constructive and downright mean.

      Writing posts like this require a great deal of time and vulnerability on the author’s part, which are two of the many reason why I don’t have a blog. I love the voice Victoria uses in this blog and hope she continues to share glimpses of her thoughts and world with strangers like us.

      Reply

  12. Maryann Leake
    March 7, 2019 @ 2:32 pm

    Love you madly.

    Reply

  13. fiverx313
    March 7, 2019 @ 2:53 pm

    “I am unsure how I can possibly STILL have SO MUCH CRAP even though I’ve been getting rid of stuff for months.”

    i’ve been doing the kondo thing for a year now and… same, girl… same

    Reply

  14. B. Wilson
    March 7, 2019 @ 2:57 pm

    I am just so conflicted about all of this. My first tax return was spent on antiques. That was 40+ years ago.
    I’m still collecting. I love the warmth of an antique table compared to a big box store table that is a picture of wood.
    I do love seeing a clean well kept home. I love staying in a fine hotel that is of course clean and uncluttered.
    But, I REALLY love when there is charm, character, and and warmth from a home or VRBO of cherished and carefully chosen items.
    I believe this is all a trend. IKEA ideology.
    I pray that my grand-kids will live in a time where old things are once again cherished. The value of these historical or one of a kind items once again noted. I am sure it will, after everyone else chucks their stuff. I hope they are happy to get Nana’s cherished items, all with quite the story to tell.

    Reply

  15. Melissa
    March 7, 2019 @ 3:09 pm

    I have too much stuff, but that didn’t stop me from coveting all you were getting rid of-well, except for the Mary Karr. My high school experience was similar so I had no difficulty letting my yearbook go before I was 25. The hardest letting go was all of the things I had to go through when my mom passed. After a few months I donated all of her clothes then gradually all of the collectibles which weren’t too my taste. Luckily she was more of a minimalist. My husband keeps reminding me that we can’t burden our kids with all this stuff so I am slowly beginning the process sans Marie Kondo (couldn’t get through her book). Hopefully I have a few good decades left to get this done.

    Reply

  16. Bernie
    March 7, 2019 @ 3:14 pm

    Gee, I thought I told you about Marie Kondo years ago. I have her book…I have not finished it. I am slowly watching the show. I have too much crap. BUT it is not all mine. Some of it belongs to my 3 adult kids, or my deceased parents/in laws. I have MUCH to do. I have given away TONS of clothes, and yes, I fold my stuff the Kondo way….I can actually find the stuff I am looking for without digging. It does surprise me that you dont want your kitchen to look like a kitchen (horror, there are actual appliances in there…but they are camoglaged so I dare you to find them.!) and you put a big ass mirror in there to double the non kitchen, kitchen….BUT you are perfectly OK with having your PJ’s in a jumble on a shelf. You are an enigma Ms VEB.! I very much like the”thank you for your service” way of getting rid of things that dont “spark joy”. I’m a fan of hers….just a very lazy fan.

    Reply

  17. Sandi
    March 7, 2019 @ 3:27 pm

    Keep going, Victoria. You will find that the cleaned up space allows you to see the precious things you love more clearly and there is true freedom in having less. A tidy and uncluttered environment gives your brain peace.

    Reply

  18. Joyce Buzick
    March 7, 2019 @ 3:39 pm

    As I approached 80 I decided to clean house and give away some things, opening a cupboard was a study in falling objects. We entertained a great deal when we were younger, so I had 28 (yes) dinner services from service for four to forty four. Silverware and glassware as needed. Cleaned out and gave away two SUV’s packed with boxes. Then having company, went for my favorite dessert service, searched cupboards, then remembered where it was. Not here. Remorse was extreme and immediate. Overall, I think it is advisable to torture your kids with the clean out.

    Reply

  19. Teri in the UK
    March 7, 2019 @ 4:17 pm

    Another hoarder here, from a family of hoarders. Have had a major chuck out before putting the house up for sale. My first chuck out was via Flylady, who mentioned “clear out your clutter with feng shui” by Karen Kingston. I laughed and cried all through her book. Anyway, the house looks nice and clear now, the double garage looks like an Amazon warehouse though. I fold T shirts and stand them up, can get more in the drawer that way.

    Reply

  20. Caroline
    March 7, 2019 @ 5:03 pm

    You are wonderful, kind and funny, and I’m so glad to hear from you again.

    Reply

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