Elvis has left the building.
We put Elvis to sleep last Tuesday.
It was time.
She had not been eating well and she just wound down and down… Even after Paul had a very serious conversation where he explained to her: earth is for eaters; if you don’t eat, you can’t stay… nonconformists will not be tolerated.
The hospice vet came to the house in the morning. We held her on our bed, on her favorite blanket. We told her that she didnāt have to be afraid, and that we loved her more than anything, and she willĀ always still be here, right in our hearts, forever.
Elvis’s head was on my shoulder when she died. I hope she didnāt know what was happening.
An hour later we took her to be cremated.
We took her all the way to the machine because my heart hurt to think of her being alone, or with strangers; and I wanted to be with her as far as I couldā¦ I don’t think she knows any of that. But it mattered a lot to me.
Then we waited for her ashes and took her back home.
She’s got a little shrine right now, with lots of flowers from the garden, and her fuzzy ball, and the small dish of whiskers she shed/I found over the last 12 years.
Itās on the spot on the rug where she would RUN, as soon as you walked in the door; she would start doing her aerobics because she wasĀ so excited that you were going to pet her…Ā At night she comes upstairs to the bedside table.
When I’m ready she’ll get moved to the Elvis Memorial Library. (Previously known as Cleveland bookcase)
For twelve years, Elvis was basically half of myself, soĀ I expected to be sad. Really sad. Debilitatingly sad. But I didn’t understand the actual FRANTIC physical sensation of missing her. Wanting to pick her up and feel her fur and talk to her and hear her purry chirp.
And I would like to say officially: THIS IS A HORRIBLE SYSTEM.
How has humanity not just curled up and died from incurable loss?
I literally do not comprehend how people survive when it is human family.
Iāve been camped out in my tent of sadness… it was really unmanageable at firstā the tent kept collapsing and trying to suffocate me.
But I think now Iāve got it packed into something more wheelbarrow-sized, which is nice and convenient because it’s portable, so when youĀ have a breakdown outside your house, you have all the supplies.
Making this video was helpful, but also so sad… I can’t believe she’s really gone.
*If you can’t watch the video, try reloading the page, or being sure that you aren’t inside of the Facebook app… it seems to break the video.
I miss everything about her. Our conversations. Her smell. Her chirp. Her smoochy face. Her white feeties. Her wompy ear.
But I know she had a wonderful life and THE MOST LOVE, and that’s really the best that any of us can hope for in this life.
Penny
August 14, 2016 @ 7:01 pm
Dear, Dear, Dear Victoria,
Elvis will always be with you, and you gave her the very best, and she knew that. She did not know she was not going to wake up, and now she is with you forever. It is very very hard. but you will get up and start walking around sometime, and it will be a little better after a while.
Robyn
August 14, 2016 @ 8:27 pm
Oh Victoria I am so sorry! It is so hard to lose a pet, words really can’t help right now. But you know in your heart, you gave Elvis a wonderful life, full of love, and she knew it. You and Paul were wonderful parents to her. It really does get better, you will be able to have memories that don’t bring you tears, one day. One day, you will think of her, and smile. Thank you for sharing your life and your beloved “Fur baby” with all of us, I think we are all crying with you. Sending you love during your time of loss. Love, love, love, and hugs.
Kitty
August 14, 2016 @ 10:11 pm
I am so very sorry for your loss.
Christine
August 14, 2016 @ 11:46 pm
I’m so sorry, Elizabeth. She was quite the kitty. Please feel free to re-share old photos of her. We’ll all miss her.
Jay
August 15, 2016 @ 2:46 am
I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet Elvis.
Each time I have lost a pet I have written down every memory, every funny story, every bad or embarrassing story that eventually became funny over time. The grief now can be so overwhelming but to me the joy of bonding with a pet always outweighs the grief and writing it all down reminds me of that.
Bleubook
August 15, 2016 @ 12:24 pm
Hey, I’m so sorry for your pain and grief. Elvis will be missed. She has a soul, and that soul is in kitty Graceland right now. She’ll wait for you there. Please share your love with other animals who need it. It’s what Elvis would have wanted.
Paula
August 15, 2016 @ 3:39 pm
No matter how long they’re with us, it’s never long enough.
We’ve had 7 dogs leave us and it never gets easier. My heart aches for you and Paul.
Kate S.
August 15, 2016 @ 6:47 pm
I’m so sorry. I’ve been in your shoes many times before and it really doesn’t get any easier with experience. Like you, I always remind myself that I give my animals all the love and that, in the end, they’ve all lived good lives, albeit far too short for my liking.
Elvis was a lucky girl to have found you. I’m sure she knew that.
Lori
August 15, 2016 @ 6:48 pm
We just putting our cat Sammy to sleep on Thursday the 11th. He was with us for almost 18 years and outlived every animal we ever had. Our family understands how you feel, all our grown children came with us when we took him to the vet to tell him goodbye and give him all the love we could. Hugs to you both
Constance
August 15, 2016 @ 9:24 pm
Oh my. I was crying my eyes out. That darling, wonderful, beloved, fabulous fur person. It makes my heart ache to know she isn’t here now – and I never even “met” her until your video.
WAAAAAAAAH.
I don’t know how you can stand it:(
Tara Soucy
August 15, 2016 @ 11:56 pm
I’ve been following you on the web and Pinterest for a while, but have never posted a comment. I love the way you write! You have a way of a transcending the reader (moi) to a place very far removed from boring, hot Arizona. I look forward to your pins on Pinterest, one of which lead me to this very, very sad post. I am sooooo sorry for your loss. I, too have a shrine to my pets that have passed. I refer to it as my Victorian Mourning cabinet. It lives in my kitchen. It’s full of containers of ashes and collars of pets I’ve lost and photos of ancestors I’ve lost (many of whom I didn’t even have a chance to meet). I’m so grateful you gave Elvis a live that most cats won’t receive. I wish you the best, look forward to new posts, and hope you find comfort in memories of better days (cliche, I know…but I lack your power with words…(you literally brought me to tears with yours….). I Just wish I could make you feel better. Sincerely.
Codi
August 16, 2016 @ 5:38 pm
So, so sorry for your heartbreak and the loss of your girl. Your posts with her in them were my favorites. Run free sweet ELvis to the Rainbow Bridge where you’ll meet your family again some day. xoxo
Harriet
August 16, 2016 @ 7:43 pm
Sorry for your loss. Pets are so precious and such a big part of our lives. Please know that your sadness will be lessened but never totally gone. I hope that there is a pet heaven & and that Elvis will meet our Rocky there!
S
August 16, 2016 @ 9:13 pm
I am so sorry to hear of Elvis’s passing. Having lovely, wonderful, perfect friendships like these are a guaranteed heartbreak. My heart hurts for you. It doesn’t ever “heal,” but it does get easier to carry the pain.
Robin
August 17, 2016 @ 12:46 am
I am so sorry for your loss. She was blessed to know such love and happiness, and you too. It really hurts. I know. Hugs.
Laura
August 17, 2016 @ 11:57 am
Oh oh oh. I am so terribly sorry. You gave her the best life a cat could possibly have, and kindly helped her go, as gently as possible, when it was time. I’m so glad you and Elvis had one another. Much love.
GS
August 17, 2016 @ 12:55 pm
I am so sorry for the loss of Elvis. My first cat that I got when I was single took so much of a liking to my DH, he was such a buddy to him. He was very smart, vocal, and had an incredible personality. When we lost him at age 15 after several years of health problems (CKD, IBD), we were just devastated as well even though, luckily, we still had another cat in the house which helped a lot.
It took us a couple of years to open our heart again, but we took in a year ago an adult female kitty who needed re-homing, and she has been the best thing to heal our hearts. We’ll never forget him, but we love her so much. She has some similar qualities to him, but she is still her own personality. Huge bonus is that she and the other cat get along well.
Dana
August 17, 2016 @ 2:48 pm
Gulp. I’ve known this loss. It’s the worst. THE WORST. This systems does SUCK. In time, the wheelbarrow will be a real dowdy purse and then a wallet that seems to leak coins. Elvis will want you to love again.
Yvonne Angus
August 17, 2016 @ 4:41 pm
Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….
Author unknown…
Jeannean Jenkins
August 17, 2016 @ 10:22 pm
I’m sorry !! It is so hard when our beloved pets die! Just know that you gave Elvis the best life possible