I was scammed on Craigslist.
We’ve established that Craigslist is the source of all awesomeness. But it’s also the source of the dumbest thing I’ve ever done. And now that we know each other so well, I think it’s time I told you the story of how I was scammed out of $200.
NOT because the internet is a scary place full of evil people.
NOT due to some sophisticated bait and switch.
Not for any reason at all, other than because I did not stop to apply rational thought to the experience I was having.
Instead, I did what I do best—charged past red-flag after red-flag… gleefully digging my own grave. And I will say this about myself—no one digs a grave like me.
In the last year, I’ve heard the phrase “under the ether.” To describe how scammers depend on emotion replacing common sense. And how people who are taken by scammers later wonder how they did not take five seconds to just THINK about whether this was a likely situation… because FIVE SECONDS is all you need to realize you are being an idiot.
Having had that exact experience, I was able to nod and congratulate myself on being totally textbook.
So. Last year my dad lost his iPhone. He put it on top of his car… and drove away.
I put an ad on Craigslist.
I should emphasize that I did NOT expect a response to my Craigslist ad. If you’re familiar with Philadelphia, you’ll recognize this is not a neighborhood where you might expect to have your phone returned and I credit the element of surprise, combined with my eagerness to believe the unbelievable, combined with my natural idiocy… which allowed me to dispense with reason.
It was a Monday. Around 10 a.m. I was sitting at my desk and my cell phone rang.
The guy on the other end said—I think I have your phone.
I freaked out.
He said—can you verify the color of the case?
And? Brace yourself.
I’m sure this will surprise you as much as it did me:
Amazingly, it was the EXACT same case.
Amazing, right?
Amazing.
Plus? It was totally amazing how he’d been visiting his brother in Philadelphia and bought the phone from a kid on the street… and now that he was on his way home, he mentioned to his wife that he bought it. And she chided him that it was probably stolen… but now he was in North Carolina. And the phone was dead, so he couldn’t look to see whose it was. But his wife looked on Craigslist and made him call me. And now he was checking out of his hotel and wanted to get on the road, and could send it to me overnight if I wired him money through Western Union.
From the page on craigslist dedicated to making sure idiots are protected from themselves:
I cannot say the guy’s story made total sense to me, because there was no point at which I applied any sense to the conversation. My only response was JOY that I had recovered my dad’s phone.
I accepted it at face value. And as scam stories go, I think it was pretty decent… I mean, it’s better than the Nigerian prince.
AND? The real kicker was that he paid $50 for it, and that was ALL he wanted. Plus shipping.
He did NOT want the $300 reward.
But I was like, oh my God you are so amazing.
And your WIFE!!! SHE is so amazing.
And my dad is going to be so amazed!
And I cannot believe this worked out so amazingly.
AMAZING.
So I insisted—I AM SENDING YOU $200.
BECAUSE YOU ARE SO AMAZING.
Plus, I was practically getting a bargain.
I was saving $100!
Then I RAN to Western Union. Because this amazing guy was on the road, and wanted to mail it out that morning, and he didn’t have too much time, and I had to do it RIGHT AWAY.
Then I called Paul and said—you will NOT believe what just happened!!!
Meaning my good fortune.
Meaning the amazingness.
Meaning the incredible generosity of the human spirit and Craigslist’s near-cosmic ability to solve all of life’s woes.
Paul said— are you sure? That sounds like a scam.
And then immediately I was like—DAMMIT.
That was totally a scam.
Once Paul said those words, there wasn’t even any transition period where my brain tried to deny it. IMMEDIATELY the spell was broken. And I sat there totally confused how I had done something so obviously stupid. I mean, I’ve done plenty of stupid things that were arguably avoidable, but not like this. Not SO OBVIOUS.
Paul said—look, I can’t talk right now, but I will make fun of you as soon as I get home.
Be sure you’re there.
Then the rest of the day he texted me stuff like:
Arkansas is NOT for sale.
And:
DO NOT BUY ARKANSAS.
But when Paul got home, he didn’t mock me. He said that he’d decided I couldn’t actually claim to have been scammed at all. Since being scammed requires some level of hesitancy or inquisitiveness– a suspension of disbelief rather than just plowing forward without thought.
I wasn’t even angry at the guy. My eagerness was such that he must have several times thought that I was scamming him.
My principal feeling was embarrassment. At being the dumbest target ever.
I COULD have been scammed for $50 dollars plus $30 for imaginary overnight shipping.
But no. I had to INSIST on sending extra.
This was so mortifying I couldn’t tell anyone.
If my brothers find out? I will NEVER hear the end of it.
When I’m on my deathbed, they will hobble in with their walkers and their oxygen tanks, and they will be sure it’s the last thing I think of before I die.
They will say things like—hey Vic? Can you hear us? Remember the time you gave that guy extra money to scam you?
And also—hey Vic? Remember that time you bought your own gas cap?
And I will come out of my coma and be like—HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT I WAS BEING SCAMMED WITH MY GAS CAP???????
Then I will die.
I think of myself as being a great judge of people.
But after being presented with some pretty fundamental evidence to the contrary, I think I need to reevaluate.
July 17, 2013 @ 2:27 am
Found this via Maskcara. You are hilarious. Glad to find another fellow scavenger and fellow Craiglist lover (I love it for the literature). Have shared the link and now you will get an additional 2 million readers, brace yourself!
July 18, 2013 @ 9:52 am
“I love it for the literature.”
So annoying when the commenters are funnier than I am.
xo
July 17, 2013 @ 3:44 am
This >>>> “My eagerness was such that he must have several times thought that I was scamming him.”
Cannot. Stop. Laughing.
July 17, 2013 @ 4:39 am
Oh my goodness. I could totally see myself doing this. Fortunately my husband has stopped me a couple of times, and yet, I still get caught up in the madness. Thank you for sharing; I don’t feel so bad now.
Like I told you before, we are conjoined twins separated at birth and your husband could be a brother to mine. Except my story would likely end with my being so mad at myself I would cry; which would stop my husband’s teasing and he would proceed to tell me how sweet, trusting (because of my sweet heart), and the most wonderful woman on the planet. Seriously, this is what he says. Anyway, my tears would dry up, I’d have a glass of wine (or two), and life would get back to normal. Love your posts… they bring back memories!
July 17, 2013 @ 6:12 am
omg! I can’t stop laughing, not at you being scammed but the “here lies V.E.B. she bought her own gas cap”! It’s 6am here in CT and I’m going to wake up the whole house laughing, you’re killing me!!!
July 17, 2013 @ 9:14 am
You got scammed because you don’t think like a con man., a criminal. Not because you are stupid. The con men have the advantage of surpriese. It’s their job and they work at it. Pros.
July 17, 2013 @ 9:16 am
Oops…..surprise.
July 17, 2013 @ 10:08 am
Victoria, at least this incident evened the score between your husband and you re. Craigslist–you were on such a streak, with that mirror and all–so now he got a little bit of fun out of it, too. And yes, no fun to be scammed and lose that money, but given how much you’re on Craigslist, in a way it was a good lesson, right? So thankfully it wasn’t more money, right? 🙂
Thanks for your great posts. I think so many of us can so totally see us in your place, which is why we love reading them so much. So don’t change!
July 17, 2013 @ 11:54 am
Victoria! Believe it or not, I think I found your dad’s cell phone!
Contact me privately to arrange restitution.
July 17, 2013 @ 4:52 pm
This makes me think of the time I got bit by my neighbor’s dog. (this was just a few years ago). All my life I’ve been a dog person, and thought I could tell the good dogs from the bad ones. And for many many years I believed wholeheartedly that dogs could smell fear, and if you genuinely were not afraid of a dog, that it would not hurt you.
One day I was walking to get my mail and the neighbors were outside, and their dog, who lived on a chain in the front yard was wagging it’s tail and watching me… plenty of slack in the chain. The dog was at ease and so was I. I asked if I could pet the dog, and the neighbors looked at each other silently, looked at the dog, and agreed it was Okay. I put my hand on that dogs head and with a blink of time I found myself snatching my hand back and seeing flesh and bone in the palm of my hand. He not only bit me but almost took a chunk of my hand.
I think my petting him surprised him, since he was a neglected dog that never got to be petted… and he was a big strong dog at that. I never was mad at him for biting me, but I learned that day, not to trust dogs I didn’t know. And I was mad at the owners (even more than before) for not giving him a well balanced socialized life that he deserved. But I chose not to press charges or call the pound, because I knew the dog would be the one who would pay with his life, and I did not want that. Thankfully they moved out a few months later to a home ‘with a fenced yard for the dog’… I can only hope he is getting more freedom these days, and that the owners are more mindful that dogs have needs too.
Lessons hit us hard at times I guess, but as they always say, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. 🙂
Just found your blog via a friend… love it. ♥ xo.
July 17, 2013 @ 5:03 pm
DancingMooney, Thanks so much for sharing that. So glad to see that there are people in this world that know a dog is only as good as his owners allow him to be. Bless your heart for not pressing charges…..
July 18, 2013 @ 8:22 am
Ugh. The way people neglect animals is the thing that makes me saddest in the whole world. Truly.
Thanks for sharing. xo
July 17, 2013 @ 6:42 pm
Tears are running down my face! Glad to know that Paul is as funny too.
July 17, 2013 @ 6:43 pm
Hmm you can’t edit this thing . I meant either funny too or as funny as you.
July 17, 2013 @ 6:48 pm
Look at it like this Crooked people hardly ever get scammed like this only good honest people. That’s the food chain in the bargain cycle. Just get some satisfaction out of knowing that Karma makes the world go round. You will get another deal like you will never believe and he will get into something where he will lose more than $200 on. Did you send it to a name and he had to show ID or did you send it to a name and all he needed was a password to pick it up? I would report it if he had to show ID. It was illegal and even though you did not follow the rules of safety, that does not give him a free pass.
July 18, 2013 @ 8:23 am
Password… I’d actually forgotten about that part of the story!! That I had to specify he not show ID! He said it was so he didn’t have to fill out a bunch of “paperwork” on his end.
*Shaking my head* at myself all over again.
July 19, 2013 @ 1:19 am
Oh my. Yes he got you but the good news is it will only happen once.
July 17, 2013 @ 9:54 pm
Oh dear….I laughed and laughed. It’s just so easy to believe. When you think about it, your ability to think the best of others is a wonderful trait. Your con artist “friend” will never know what it’s like to live in color, mainly because people like that have emotions only when they are “playing” someone. So sorry you were scammed. Thanks for sharing the story…..
July 17, 2013 @ 11:05 pm
I didn’t work today and spent hours reading your blog from the beginning. I would say I wasted most of the day but I laughed so much it had to be healthy!
July 17, 2013 @ 11:46 pm
Gretchen, I did the same thing a week or so ago. 🙂 I woke up the next morning and tried to remember what great book I had been reading, because I needed to finish it!
July 18, 2013 @ 6:43 am
My dear, you do realize that Craigslist owes you. Big time. I’m sure you’ve increased their traffic tenfold since those last couple of posts. Let’s step it up to prime time. Why not Antiques Road Show? Is that still on stateside? You need to turn.it.up. a notch. I wanna see Paul sweat it out as he awaits the final appraisal.
My friend, your neighbor – you know the one (open your mind to OLYMPIC proportions) introduced me to your blog. And I’ve been here ever since.
Now go on. Find out when ARS is coming your way. In the meantime, keep writing.
July 19, 2013 @ 11:21 am
A- I need to pay said neighbor for promoting me. As soon as I make one cent, I will cut her in.
B- why has Craig himself not contacted me to be his spokesperson? I could do a killer commercial for them.
C- I’m pretty sure I’ve sealed my own fate of never finding anything good ever again because now everyone has been reminded how awesome Craigslist is.
July 18, 2013 @ 1:12 pm
Another awesome post Victoria! We’ve all done things like this. Thanks for sharing it with us!
July 18, 2013 @ 3:03 pm
Victoria you’ve hit another grand slam w/this post! I laughed, I cried, and I know just how you feel! Love your blog, always share it w/friends who ask for blog recs! Your rock story or the mirror, not sure which is my favorite, now I have to add this to the fave list! Hope the next one I add to fave list doesn’t cost you any $$$.
July 18, 2013 @ 4:00 pm
Funny story yes, but no mention….or maybe I missed that part of you giving him your address to send the phone. Yes? No? If yes, I would be careful with strangers around your home.
blessings, jill
July 19, 2013 @ 4:04 pm
I’m always extremely hesitant with things, so I am always assuming I’m getting scammed even when I’m not. So I’m sort of your opposite. However, I did something on eBay a good while ago that involved a scammer trying to get something I was selling. After a long and convoluted story involving about 3 months of emails I ended up on the plus side of $500 and still kept the item. So as far as the scammers scales of justice go, perhaps my victory required your penalty, and for that I apologize. Here’s to using this experience to prevent a repeat. And hey, it made a good CL related read.
July 20, 2013 @ 9:44 am
Great story. I’ve been lucky enough to have had things returned to me by random strangers –several times actually, so don’t give up the faith. I love your husbands response. Mine would not, I fear, have responded in the same way.
July 21, 2013 @ 12:47 am
WTF? One minute I’m Googling recipes for vegan, gluten-free cornbread and the next, three hours has passed and I’m groggily surfacing from a self-induced coma of gluttonous indulgence in your fabulous blog. No idea how I got here. Some kind of time/space wiggle/warp. So glad I found you. Your wit sparkles and skitters through the ether and your honesty and sweet vulnerability make me want to wrap my arms around you, mom-like. Which I am probably old enough to be. Write anything. I’ll read it. You sizzle.