An update of vital unimportance.
If you emailed me or sent me kitchen ideas in the last two weeks, I was having a crisis. And then the original crisis was totally eclipsed by a second… and now stuff has piled up to the point where everything is unmanageable. I may never dig out.
I sort of wanted to explain the crisis, but decided I couldn’t face the extensive typing it would require.
That’s one of the many problems with having a crisis AND a blog: the blog requires that you write everything down, and edit it, and find accompanying images, and compress them, and upload them, and think of a catchy title, and hope people share it on Facebook… and make sure your crisis is entertaining.
But the crisis makes you want to sit on the couch and watch Say Yes to the Dress. Which I’ve JUST discovered and am angry that no one told me about it before now.
It’s something that should fill me with scorn. But instead is so soothing that I want to watch it for hours until my brain melts out my ears.
A reader suggested in the comments last week that I look up the kitchen from Dynasty… and I didn’t even have to, because another reader found it for me (and hello? THAT HOUSE!)
And speaking of comments, if you are not reading them? You’re missing out on the best part.
Not only are you all far more entertaining than I am, you also seem a lot more organized and sensible.
You even have ways to make golf more interesting—pointing out that if played at 200 miles an hour, like Nascar… it would be riveting.
I’m planning to just turn the content over to you all, and dedicate my time to Craigslist and bridal-reality-television and looking at kitchen stuff I cannot remotely afford.
That is from The Enchanted Home’s house tour… Maybe everyone on the internet already knows about her, but until one of you evil people sent me the link, I didn’t…
I spent an hour going through her site and saying—what? What? WHAT IS THAT?
Her house confuses me. Like– I’m sorry? That’s your HOUSE?
I cannot even comprehend what that must be like.
It was sort of like finding out that aliens DO exist. And they have really nice stoves.
To her? A house is a place where everything is beautiful and perfect and finished and huge and the stove costs more than my car. And actually my car is really crappy, so that’s probably not even a good comparison.
To me, a house is where you live, and there is laundry on the floor, and sometimes the cat barfs and you are grateful if it’s on the hardwood and not the rug.
More like this:
So. Anyway. This post lacks any coherent theme or purpose. The crisis (and possibly reality TV) have made me dull. But also there is something pleasant about being able to hit publish on anything I want… Like I am rebelling against society’s expectations for topic-sentences and conclusion-paragraphs.
I do have a bunch of projects I want to share with you, but haven’t gotten around to photographing them. (See crisis, et al.)
We finished the medical table (almost) and I am so excited to say that we are FINALLY finishing the garden urn… it’s been a full year since we got it, and it took me this long to decide that it really did need to be overhauled.
We had it sandblasted because there was SO MUCH paint and rust that it was really the only way we’d get a totally clean surface. It’s ready to be picked up, so tonight or tomorrow we’ll see what we’re working with. I’ll post a photo on Facebook when we get it.
AND most exciting is that after three years of pestering– Paul has agreed to build me a glass-front bookcase in a small nook on the third floor.
I would show you a photo of the space, but I should really clean up first—so as to not actually verify any resemblance to the above photo.
I will love you EVEN MORE… if you share me with your friends.
September 10, 2013 @ 1:35 pm
I LOVED that urn and cannot wait to see what you’ve decided to do with it. YAY!!
September 10, 2013 @ 1:36 pm
Damn it to hell. Now I need a loggia.
September 10, 2013 @ 1:55 pm
…and a few hundred blue and white ginger jars. 🙂
September 10, 2013 @ 6:10 pm
Right, Blackbird! You said it.
And here I am sitting in total chaos. Boxes, papers, and all manner of things scattered around in my 4000 sq. ft. apartment. Preparing to move to a darling smaller house in a retirement community. It’s a wonderful place and I will love it there, but there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that I can ever have a loggia. Choices must be made.
Victoria Elizabeth….how could be love you more?!
September 10, 2013 @ 1:55 pm
Where the hell did you find the medical cabinet? What glorious estate sales have this goodness? I’ve been begging James to either help me build or restore one for our bathroom for so long now I think we may move before anything gets done. The only thing I am finding at thrift stores etc these days are gold trimmed 80’s furniture and no matter how many people try to convince me they’re back, yeah, maybe at their home. Mine. Never.
September 10, 2013 @ 1:59 pm
I am at the library working on my show when the picture comes up with the cat peeking in from the side. Burst out laughing! Your humor sustains me lately.
September 10, 2013 @ 2:15 pm
I often spend Sunday afternoons watching “Say Yes to the Dress” until my brains melts out of my ears. It is much better than dealing with the news. Tina’s house (The Enchanted Home) is quite grand, isn’t it. I just finished my own grand kitchen remodel (took one year). I love it, with the exception of all the difficulties, but it is kind of like childbirth…once it is over, you forget the pain. My kitchen and Tina’s have many similarities: Calcutta Gold marble countertops, carved marble stove hood, etc. The only difference is my whole house could fit in her kitchen. As for Little Edie Beale and her mother Big Edie, they were troubled yet fascinating women. That photo of Little Edie hardly tells the story of how they lived until cousin Jackie O came to their rescue and renovated their home. Watch the Maisel brother’s documentary. It’s great. I hope your current crisis is not of enormous proportions and will be resolved soon.
Best…Victoria
September 10, 2013 @ 2:51 pm
V: I love that you love “Say Yes” because when I was in the midst of my chaos I craved my “Say Yes” time to sit numb in front of the TV and just Veg. The Chaos would still be there but I needed to step away, shut off the brain, and soak in white frilly froofroo. 🙂
September 10, 2013 @ 3:30 pm
I cracked up all through the post, but the photo bombing cat was the best.
September 10, 2013 @ 4:07 pm
OK…I just have to say there are far better blogs to ask not to email you any more.
Geesh, don’t you need a laugh and some great comradery Dawn Mershon?
We love you Victoria. We’d love you even more if we got a hint of what the “crisis” was.
Our own private Say Yes to the Crisis show 😉
September 10, 2013 @ 4:18 pm
Oh, no you did NOT invoke Little Edie while discussing your home renovation. I have watched Grey Gardens countless times and I am still fascinated by Big and Little Edie. How splendid to live in a house that never had to be cleaned! And, at the same time,you now have me hooked on the Enchanted Home Blog, as well as yours. Surely I was meant to live in that house, provided I had staff. I would love to be the one who casually mentions that I spend a lot of my time in my LOGGIA! You are wicked, Victoria, and hilarious!
September 10, 2013 @ 6:36 pm
Thank you- getting sucked into that Grey Harden website now :). Also I have a suggestion for a countertop- soapstone!! Hope the crisis is averted and you can watch Yes To The Dress guilt free ( I have a little guilt because I have my two sons addicted to it- they will be the best grooms ever someday!)
September 10, 2013 @ 6:38 pm
Oh Victoria, yours are good people. They validate why I stopped following the enchanted cottage after 2 weeks.
September 10, 2013 @ 7:00 pm
yes, it is always a good day when you find out the cat has puked on the hardwood floor instead of the carpet or rug.
the same goes for dog puke, better if on the hardwood then on carpet or rug or worse still on the bed.
at least we don’t have my older cat anymore (died of old age some years ago) he would take a poop IN between the sheets of my brothers bed, which of course would have my brother yelling and screaming when he tried to get into that bed. cat was smart though, he would generally disappear for a few days once he did that little endeavor. i thank God the cat never did that one to us (it was a hate-hate relationship between the cat and my brother.)
September 10, 2013 @ 7:40 pm
I love that you use TV as a distraction…for me it’s weird medical shows…not even sure why. The Enchanted Home tour was unreal…I don’t enjoy homes that are so out of reach of everyday people…I much prefer real homes with real people and all their crises and confusion.
September 10, 2013 @ 7:40 pm
You are hysterical!! Love your approach to life… decisions…whatever’s on your plate at the moment…Cat/dog puke…middle of the night…barefoot, yep…life is good …it’s even better when it’s your husband that steps in it 😉 I also have a dog that ate the carpet because there was cat puke on it…go figure.
September 10, 2013 @ 7:48 pm
i don’t know whether to be sad or glad. you have introduced me to the word LOGGIA. and that house, i mean mansion, i mean castle. as much as i love excess on all levels, i hope— no, EXPECT you to stay true to Victoria style and not be too inspired by the “enchanted home.” 🙂
September 10, 2013 @ 8:11 pm
Can’t wait to see the urn!
September 10, 2013 @ 8:21 pm
Victoria, I am scared of urns! One, because sometimes at estate or garage sales they still have dead peoples ashes in them, true story! Your giant urn is huge and the history if the company is the made tombstones and monuments and such. Yours looks creepy, to me I am afraid of buying things off Craigs list. Since I live in the mountains of the Sierra Nevada ours is small and limited and most items are 50 miles away or farther. How do you know your urn wasn’t
a grave marker and some grave robber stole it for money? See any hauntings lately? Down in Louisiana and southern swamp states grave robbing is common since everyone is buried above ground because of flooding. Every see their spooky cemeteries? People grave rob all the time jewelry, etc buried with the corpse for money. I think the ghost of the corpse will haunt them. Well good luck with your urn. Time to go make dinner. Your husband is better than mine, mine would have never let me buy the stuff you buy, but I have a whole garage and doll room full of mistakes as an antique dealer and doll expert I cant get rid of. Mine aren’t haunted, lol. Anytime you want to see pictures of my stuff for sale you are welcome
hubby says I have to clean out my stuff although I have been waiting 5 years for him to finish my laundry room in garage!
September 10, 2013 @ 9:20 pm
I just had to leave a little comment on Say Yes to the Dress. My daughter is 24. She has Aspergers. The only time she has worn a dress since she was about four was for her high school prom (she went with a step-cousin). She lives in tshirts and jeans, doesn’t wear makeup (fine motor skills are still an issue), and while she can put her hair in a ponytail, it always looks like she has just finished running 10 miles.
But she LOVES Say Yes to the Dress. I was shocked, to say the least, when she told me she watched it. Her ‘thing’ has always been animals – mainly horses – NEVER anything even close to girly. But this show must have some kind of soothing power over even the wildest of beasts, because she could watch a week-long marathon (just give her food delivery and her cat). Does it have subliminal messaging of some kind?
September 11, 2013 @ 2:20 am
I clicked through to the home tour and said “I’m sorry, what?” out loud when I saw the first picture. I don’t even. You mean there are people who actually live in houses like that?
I feel you on the crisis malaise. You want to do something about it. You know you should do something about it. But it’s a lot easier to sit on the couch, watch TV and pretend the crisis doesn’t exist. I do this a lot with regards to the state of my house.
September 11, 2013 @ 3:46 am
OMG!! I have now looked at the Enchanted House and my eyes burn from all the beauty and magic!
I now think that the solution lies in the blog name.. Obviously she lives in Narnia and has left her family on the other side of the cupboard! That must be it, right? Right??!
Oh, and she must have a magical army of cleaning elves (elfs? English is my second language, sorry!) and after looking at her pictures I want one to!!