People. Hello.
This post was published June 18, 2020… so, 6 months into covid, shortly after George Floyd protests began… that’s the vibe here.
It’s been a while.
How are you?
I am… fine?
I guess?
Assuming we now define FINE, as: ever-escalating incredulity, and disbelieving rage.
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I have not been here since before Coronavirus… the past months, panic– my baby brother works in an emergency room, Paul cannot work from home.
I wrote 87,900 pages…
… summed up:
I did NOT expect the apocalypse to have infomercials.
SCIENCE IS STUPID.
LET’S GET THE MY PILLOW GUY.
This, out of all the– THIS IS SIMPLY NOT POSSIBLE YET IT IS HAPPENING ANYWAY… returns to me occasionally and I wonder if I HALLUCINATED that during a pandemic, the American people were addressed by THE MY PILLOW GUY.
Did that actually happen?
OR HAVE I TAKEN PEOYTE AND FORGOTTEN?
Then Armaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, George Floyd.
I’ve been thinking how humanity is still in the middle ages… we think we are evolved, but it has only been 157 years since we ENSLAVED BLACK HUMANS.
That’s basically no time at all.
Black humans, alive today, remember not being allowed to drink out of the same water fountain as white people… we, the United States of America, did not even TRY to end this, until 1964.
1964 was YESTERDAY… 30 seconds ago— the humans who approved of this system, are still alive, they raised children. They voted. They RIOTED when we tried to change their mind.
WANNA TALK ABOUT #RIOTS?
This picture is from Levittown, Pennsylvania in 1957. As many as 600 RIOTOUS protesters gathered to terrorize the first Black family, Bill and Daisy Myers, to move into this all-white development.
White riots ≠ Black protests #BlackLivesMattter pic.twitter.com/LlLKFykPsi
— André Marcel Harris (@andreharris89) June 7, 2020
Now, the POLICE are rioting, as we lecture PEACEFUL protesters about how THEY must be CALM in response to police terrorizing Black humans.
Ummmm… no.
A TIDAL WAVE OF RAGE IS THE CORRECT RESPONSE.
Especially considering how humans will riot at ANYTHING.
Basically, we are all just sitting around waiting.
I am certain of this because when the Eagles football team won the Super Bowl a year and a half ago, Philadelphia’s response was to set the city on fire, flip cars, loot stores, and eat dog poop.
Oh, wait no, that’s fake news… sorry!
I googled it. It was HORSE poop.
AND APPARENTLY the city EXPECTED this— because ahead of time, they greased lamp posts with Crisco so nobody could climb them and HURT themselves.
The headlines were NOT: idiots riot, because idiocy.
The headlines were: celebrations turn rowdy.
So it makes me wonder– should the response to the public execution of a handcuffed man, lying immobile on the ground, be more, or less, rowdy, than when you win a football game?
Fun Fact: The first Pride was literally a riot against, you guessed it, POLICE BRUTALITY! ✨ HAPPY PRIDE MONTH pic.twitter.com/JQmz0t4HLF
— tim hell. (@itsTimHell) June 1, 2020
I’ve been thinking that MAYBE Coronavirus isn’t just a weird timeout in human history… MAYBE it will be the impetus that shifts our collective perspective… MAYBE NOW, a radical transformation of a system that gives safety, only to those born with privilege.
For months now, every day, I think about the people who are existing in a place of enormous stress, financial insecurity, housing, food, SCARCITY… panicked, just surviving.
We force the least-privileged, to scramble, just to endure a HARD existence… we gesture to their bootstraps.
WHERE IS OUR EMPATHY?
It’s literally ALL we need.
My initial response to Coronavirus was to re-read And The Band Played On, and Polio… both survived my decluttering phase— they are excellent.
And The Band Played On, by Randy Shilts is an extraordinary documentation of the Aids epidemic— the first time I read it, I literally COULD NOT BELIEVE how INEPT AND BLIND AND DELIBERATELY STUPID our government was… and even while I KNEW the outcome, my brain STILL could not process such disbelieving horror… like, MAYBE I’m wrong! Maybe this will be FINE because SURELY we would not have been like— the blood supply is killing people? Bummer for THEM!
Polio: An American Story, by David M. Oshinsky, is a less-dementing book; because not only did we get a vaccine, it turns out people are SUPER into their children, so nobody was like— OH WELL SHRUG EMOJI.
I have a lot to catch up on here… Yes. I have a kitchen update.
Figured I would first say hello and confirm that I am alive, and thank you for your messages… I am sorry I could not respond… my catatonia has been REAL, YO.
But I guess I’m adjusting to the dystopian sideshow that is now our existence because we have a sample cabinet door, (Paul is not doing the drawer fronts) and I’m finally finding a stain place… Weirdly, I haven’t felt like emailing around, being like— hi, I know it’s the apocalypse but are you available to stain some drawers?
I am thankful this started in spring— getting the garden in has been a great distraction; and especially at the beginning, helped alleviate my fear that the food supply would be affected… we have a LOT of kale for End Times, and this is very reassuring to me.
Ok. That’s it.
I’ll go write a kitchen post.
ALSO the post about what I bought on Craigslist*… NOT giant, or fancy, just a smallish box… but still!
*driveway pickup, masks
I HOPE YOU ALL ARE WELL AND SAFE.
xo
June 18, 2020 @ 4:34 pm
I have not read through your post as of yet, just thankful to see one and hope you are well.. and to let you know you’ve been sorely missed.. so glad to have you back.. love and healthy vibes to you, Paul, family and kitty clan.
June 18, 2020 @ 4:39 pm
Thank you for voicing your thoughts. You have been missed, and I look forward to future posts. Your writings are certainly a welcome distractions from all the gloom. Stay safe.
June 18, 2020 @ 4:48 pm
My favorite stanza from a poem has always been: “Let me live in a house by the side of the road and be a friend to man”….I’m thinking I might change that to: Let me live in a house by the side of the road and be a friend to animals”. There are so many “experts” on the flings on today – “experts” unwilling to realize that perhaps they are only partly right. The hatred, the lies, the all or nothing way of thinking – has driven me to the dogs (a wonderful place to be).
There is good and bad in all walks of life, all races, etc. to demonize the good for the misdeeds of a few helps no one.
June 18, 2020 @ 4:50 pm
Thank you so much for this post! I love your passion for what you believe in. And I’m thrilled that we share the same beliefs! I would be absolutely heartbroken if I found out the only protests you believed in were the ones demanding your right not to wear a mask!!! Thank you for allowing your outrage to come out on the right side of humanity!!
June 18, 2020 @ 5:11 pm
Tuff times. Our son is insulin dependent Type 1 diabetic, lost his job in a restaurant so stays with us weekdays so he can eat healthy. Has rec’d only one $200 unemployment check thus far. His condo is in a very very high COVID positive county so we try to keep him with us yet still carrying his housing expenses. My mom was an amputee, also living in a nursing home in that county, contracted COVID, was hospitalized and died. None of us could be with her or talk to her those last weeks. The home was on lockdown since the first week of March which was the last time I saw her. Her ashes arrived the day before Mother’s day. We can’t even have a service yet. My brother is having cancer surgeries & treatments & can’t be around any of us. We can only talk on the phone since Feb. We don’t go anywhere except to buy supplies and I try to stay sane with projects and gardening. I was a military kid, we just never did the race thing…everyone was equal according to their rank, color never entered in at all. I had baby dolls of differing colors and races, we lived all over the world. I don’t understand why that’s so hard to understand. Everyone matters, the end. COVID took a lot from us. I just don’t have the energy for a rant. But kitchen renos, kittens, fresh food from the garden & dancing videos are great distractions.
June 18, 2020 @ 5:17 pm
Pamela, Air Force Brat here, so I know what you mean about the military. So sorry to hear about your loss . 🙁
June 18, 2020 @ 5:40 pm
Pamela, I am so very sorry for your loss. I have no words. Just a fog of sadness for you. This is so very, very surreal. I grew up in a home where everyone was welcome. EVERY ONE. I live my life that way EXCEPT, I do not let bigots cross my doorstep. I employ garlic and all manner of booby traps. Said in jest because I can’t even imagine what you’ve been through. My sympathy is all I have to offer.
June 18, 2020 @ 5:20 pm
Finally…something that let me cry…then laugh…then cry…and actually hope that this time is a catalyst for change. Finally.
June 18, 2020 @ 5:21 pm
May I suggest a book, The Hot Zone by Richard Preston (1994), about Ebola.
June 18, 2020 @ 5:36 pm
I have missed you so. And yaasss, ditto and pass the rage please.
June 18, 2020 @ 5:43 pm
Black humans are still enslaved in Africa where slave markets still exist and yes it is awful. Also society sucks. Glad you’re ok, but hoping corona gets all the racists and pedophiles and people who beat their spouses/children.
June 18, 2020 @ 5:47 pm
You are essential to the people, dummy. Don’t ever do that again. I kept checking to see why my computer no worky. It’s like when Stephen Colbert goes on vacation. Good for him, I guess, but the world suffers. Your points are actually better than Colbert. You>Colbert.
June 18, 2020 @ 6:07 pm
Fun fact: when I read And the Band Played On back in the 90s I discovered that a guy I had dated in college was gay. (He is mentioned in the book.)
June 18, 2020 @ 6:08 pm
Also, read The Great Influenza by John Berry. Very pertinent to these days.
June 18, 2020 @ 6:16 pm
Sending love from Minneapolis. Thanks for your post and glad you’re back.
June 18, 2020 @ 6:26 pm
You’re BACK!!! So glad!!!! You picked a crazy, terrifying, and enraging time to disappear. We simply must do better and change this country for the better. I’m so tired of my fellow humans being persecuted for how they look, who they love, how they dress. Time to recognize our privilege and stop turning a blind eye to others suffering. Love you Victoria and so happy to “see” you again! P.S. Tell us about the kitties too.
June 18, 2020 @ 6:37 pm
I’ve really missed your posts. We FINALLY found a kitchen designer/contractor we like his work and trust him. He came Monday morning with four plan possibilities. Monday evening I was admitted to the hospital with fever of unknown origin, not COVID (thank goodness.) I am still in hospital and infectious disease consult has ruled out so many things and so far not found the source. Maybe get to go home tomorrow night–maybe not. I brought the kitchen plans with me. I wish I could get your opinion, but I love our microwave… 🙂 And we are going to re-use our still working refrigerator. And my DH is not a handy person. He’s a great person, but this is not his bailiwick. I want to be envisioning, shopping, comparing and )instead I am lying in a hospital bed and only one visitor a day. Thankful I brought my computer. I cannot find an updated kitchen post or the “driveway pickup” ??? post, or “masks” ??? (I sew and have made nearly 250 masks and have donated all of them…I don’t want to make money on Covid.)
June 18, 2020 @ 6:44 pm
Goodbye.
June 18, 2020 @ 7:00 pm
Oh my gosh I have missed you!!!!! So glad you are all ok and that you are back. Some more really good books: White Fragility (Robin Diangelo), How To Be An Antiracist and Stamped From the Beginning (both by Ibram X. Kendi), Citizen (Claudia Rankine), everything Maya Angelou, The Ways of White Folk (Langston Hughes), The Hate U Give (Angie Thomas), anything Richard Wright esp. Native Son and Black Boy, The Underground Railroad (Colson Whitehead), Between The World and Me (Ta-Nehisi Coates) anything James Baldwin….those are just a few 😊. So so so happy to have you back!!!!!
June 18, 2020 @ 7:28 pm
Right on, sister! (I lived through the sixties.) I was an English teacher for thirty years, and the language has failed me. I cannot put into words how I feel about what is happening in our country, but your post is a good start.
June 18, 2020 @ 7:42 pm
❤️
June 18, 2020 @ 7:52 pm
Thank you for including your comments on the current rage inducing condition in society. And thank you for being on the correct side of this. History will not be kind to those who have abused their fellow humans.
Sadly the racists think the system should be destroyed so it can be rebuilt as an autocratic society without human or civil rights. We need new laws to protect us from bad actors who abuse their position and power in government and business, and cheat in elections and deprive people of their right to vote and have a say in our government. Right now we are in a lawless society where the people committing crimes against humanity, crimes against the most vulnerable, and the environment
are rewarded and the innocent are punished for pushing back. This has to stop. VOTE and take action like your life depends on it at the Federal, state and local level. Register to vote by mail and check your registration 30 days before the election so you have time to fix things if you are deleted off the voter rolls. Record with your phone any problems you observe with election offices or voting places. Use a vacation day on voting day if you must. Check to see how many polling places are in poor areas versus affluent areas in your state and demand equity – put it on the news NOW. Work to get rid of the biased electoral college. Vote blue. Ignore 3rd parties who just want to siphon off votes from Democrats. Demand hand marked paper ballots with paper backup. If the math doesnt work for an election in your are investigate and do not certify the election. The cheaters from the last election must be stopped. There was no way the 4 swing states voted in favor of T – it was statistically impossible. The latest voting machines are subject to meddling. No reason why the whole country cant vote by mail using paper ballots. My state and numerous others have been doing it for years with no problems.