Kitchen Design — Liberace meets Versailles.
I need this kitchen to be special.
Like me.
Basically, I am thinking Versailles. But Paul? Paul wants to order cabinets from the cabinet place… Why does he want me to live a lie?
Did he not get the memo? About the Sun King?
About how the kitchen must be a révolution of wit and surprise and charm?
Also, we should have jesters.
After enduring Paul’s umpteenth lecture proselytizing the benefits of cabinets from the cabinet store, I realized that the problem is that CLEARLY, Paul has not spent enough time on the internet.
If he had, he would KNOW that your kitchen is an extension of your SOUL… And MY soul is not full of cabinets from the cabinet place.
architectural digest, petworth house
Plus, I reminded him – You know I write a blog, right? Maybe you’ve heard me talk about it? Well, in blog-land your kitchen must be magical. And full of whimsy and novelty and fantastic ideas that people PIN ON PINTEREST.
I said—let me help you understand. Here is my KITCHEN BOARD.
See?
Marble, marble, marble, marble.
$40,000 stove, $50,000 stove, $60,000 stove.
Giant range hood, giant-er range hood, giant-est range hood.
Paul acted progressively more horrified. Which after nearly 10 years of marriage has to be an act… If he expected anything less than utter madness? He didn’t think it through.
Plus, I’ve nearly gone blind in service to my Pinterest board, so maybe he wants to act a little grateful?
Now. Let’s specify what I mean by a kitchen defined as “Liberace meets Versailles.”
1. Unexpected – seeing as how Liberace is dead, there is an immediate element of surprise to see him reincarnated in my kitchen.
2. Dispensing with all practicality – Versailles is art over function. Old and full of character. Also, servants.
3. Over the top – this could mean different things to different people. Shiny, bold, big, unusual, fancy, repurposed, or just plain flat-out-insane-amount-of-money-to-spend-on-any-room-in-your-house.
What’s that? That is not a kitchen? Why are you so critical?
Wouldn’t you rather have THAT than a kitchen?
Besides, as you can see – there is PLENTY of room for a stove.
ps – THANK YOU for all your comments, sharing, and emails on last week’s luxury-kitchen manifesto, but PLEASE STOP giving me practical advice– I have to work REALLY HARD to ignore it… pps– Extra thanks to Making It Lovely (she is also doing a Victorian) & Rage Against The Minivan (greatest name ever, no?) For sending me lots of their blog-friends.
June 10, 2014 @ 1:26 pm
Oh my god the one with the red-and-white checkered floor YES!!!!
June 24, 2014 @ 11:46 am
You my dear, are the BEST! You make me smile with your good taste and wonderful sense of humor:D
March 15, 2016 @ 10:30 pm
“Also, servants.” ? That’s what my kitchen is missing!!
May 11, 2016 @ 12:23 pm
Not sure how I missed this post – love it (as usual). Had to look at the “GE penthouse tiny kitchen” pic you shared. Such a tiny kitchen with only room for a 30″ refrigerator and two dishwashers. Great use of adjectives – none of those would fit my kitchen. Pardon me while I find a bridge to jump off – or consider converting the living and dining rooms into additional kitchen space and search for the crafts person most capable of doing our silver leaf accents . . .
Here’s the probable cause of my demise:
Making a compact kitchen luxurious and beautiful may seem implausible, but it’s not at all uncommon for New Yorkers who refuse to think small. As this sparkling penthouse kitchen proves, it’s the result of some clever ideas and careful planning.
To create the illusion of space and light, the architects designed the kitchen like a vintage jewelry box and let the idea radiate throughout the room.
Almost everything inside the kitchen is reflective, creating a breathtaking effect. A decorative chandelier provides a sophisticated focal point the room. Light from the chandelier and accent fixtures grazes across double-barrel vaulted ceilings, custom moldings and curved wall cabinets with silver-leaf detailing. A Monogram® stainless-metallic induction cooktop and mirrored backsplash pick up the light and amplify it so that you can see a full spectrum of colors. Light also dances across marble floor tiles, accentuating its polish and texture.
Monogram custom appliances figure prominently into the optical fantasy. A 30″ fully integrated refrigerator and wine reserve and two 18″ dishwashers blend into the background of the kitchen, integrating perfectly with the overall design scheme.
May 7, 2017 @ 6:03 pm
These kitchens are so beautifully designed. My wife is similar to your husband and prefers to have a simple, cheap, functional kitchen but I’m desperate for a bold kitchen that we can be proud of. Thanks for sharing these images, I’ll definitely use them as inspiration.
Good luck on your kitchen journey!
September 22, 2023 @ 12:51 pm
Photo Credits?!?!