97 Comments

  1. Tattycoram
    February 23, 2016 @ 10:56 am

    I have slightly cracked rib from slipping on the ice next week, messy house, raging deadlines, news as of three minutes ago that children have early dismissal on account of as-yet-nonexistent snow–and yet I had to drop everything to read this post. Reaction on completion: feel ready for anything.

    Reply

    • Tattycoram
      February 23, 2016 @ 10:57 am

      Argh I slipped LAST week (to be precise, Tuesday at 9:32 in the morning as I was carrying Goodwill stuff to car and taking my husband to the Acela)

      Reply

    • Caroline
      February 23, 2016 @ 11:09 am

      Nature abhors a vacuum, they say, so surely that empty space will soon be filled with something more worthy (and definitely fancier).

      Reply

    • Paige
      February 24, 2016 @ 3:03 pm

      An ottoman that looks like a giant soda cracker and is larger than the mirror-back settee it serves seems a bit anti-fancy, but fashion eludes me and I may just be revealing my ignorance. My cats are riveted my your blog, and I too enjoy it.

      Reply

      • Pam Kalista
        April 20, 2016 @ 9:29 am

        Yes. Your blog is fabulous. Your mania is shared. However the ottoman deserves it’s own special place in “Architectural Egest”

        Reply

  2. Maureen
    February 23, 2016 @ 10:56 am

    You are hysterical!

    and that ottoman has to go……Love your floors — love the settee -now get an appropriate rug! – i am getting my great grandmother’s settee reupholstered this month — removing the original gold velvet and bringing it into 2016! —-

    your blog is awesome!

    Reply

  3. Ann
    February 23, 2016 @ 10:57 am

    Paul must wonder each day what will be missing and what new GFT will be in its place when he returns from work. One thing seems certain, being Mr. V.E.B will always be intetesting. 🙂

    Reply

  4. Nancy
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:04 am

    Never a dull moment. You are hilarious.

    Reply

  5. Garden, Home and Party
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:05 am

    So, did you make money on the “bargain” RH sofa? I hope so, that way you can buy the beauteous piece that you love before someone less worthy grabs it! I get caught up in the whole RH sales pitch too. I have several friends and some family that love their furniture, but it really isn’t my style and like you said, we have to be who we are. Right?
    P.S. what’s going on in the kitchen? I’m a kitchen fanatic and can hardly wait to see the finished product.
    xo,
    Karen

    Reply

  6. Jayne
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:06 am

    Ottoman – out! I bet you can make some money on it. Don’t buy a hideous sofa; it may well be a really hideous sofa. Don’t buy anything you have to decide on in a New York minute. Buy things that you can ponder for a week or more. Everything worth having is worth waiting for. I’m old, I know this!
    You make me laugh, and I thank you for that!!!!!!!!

    Reply

  7. diane
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:14 am

    This is a lame question, but what is GFT???

    Reply

    • Victoria Elizabeth Barnes
      February 23, 2016 @ 11:16 am

      Giant Fancy Thing… NOT a lame question! My own fault for assuming you can read my mind.

      Reply

  8. Debbie from MountainMama
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:17 am

    Ok, you totally crack me up – I had to go back to all your links and was laughing my head off at the one where you acquired the wardrobe!! Can’t wait to find out what GFT has caught your eye to the point that you need to sell EVERYTHING ELSE YOU OWN – but no doubt it will be awesome!!

    Reply

  9. Linda
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:23 am

    Never ending source of amusement, fascination, like minded thinking……you just amaze me,VEB.

    Reply

  10. Christine
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:30 am

    Oh wow, so glad I read the comments too. I mistook GFT for god forsaken thing….LOL Those wonderful things we want but our wallets say “are you kidding” but we still skimp on those litte unnecessary items like food to have.

    Oh yeah, totally relating right now!

    Reply

    • Victoria Elizabeth Barnes
      February 23, 2016 @ 11:57 am

      Actual lol… if you asked my husband he’d agree with your original guess.

      Reply

      • Maureen
        February 27, 2016 @ 10:30 am

        GFT

        Love this idea!!
        I have been collecting and fixing things for years! You are fun fun fun

        Reply

  11. Sharyl Murphy
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:32 am

    Hi Victoria, another great laughter inducing post. I’m doing this in comments because you aren’t responding to your private message on Facebook. Could it be you don’t know about the magic of Messenger? I’d like to pay for you to come to a huge antique show in New England and talk about blogging etc. Any interest? PM Me please!

    Reply

    • Victoria Elizabeth Barnes
      February 23, 2016 @ 11:50 am

      Once the fb messages pile up too much, I can’t open them anymore (which, uh, I guess I will include in my talk of “what not to do.”)

      Reply

  12. Cathy
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:33 am

    LOVE your blog but just had to chime in to say be careful of the scale of your pieces. Yes I realize the irony of saying that due to what GFT stands for. But the massive wardrobe and island-sized ottoman are seriously fighting with and dwarfing the victorian sofa so it looks like a dollhouse piece. Seriously, go back and really look at the photo again under the “Girl, no. Bye.” caption and you’ll see it.

    Reply

    • Victoria Elizabeth Barnes
      February 23, 2016 @ 11:39 am

      Don’t worry, I agree! I am going to fix that because soon everything will be equally giant!! (Or the entire house will be empty.)

      Reply

  13. Jeanne
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:35 am

    I so enjoy this site and your humor:)
    I link to your “Manifesto Against the Tyranny of Luxury Kitchens” frequently when answering questions on the Houzz forum when internet brainwashing and HGTV marketing has convinced someone their very pretty kitchen is not up to snuff – usually because it is not white.

    Reply

    • Victoria Elizabeth Barnes
      February 23, 2016 @ 11:39 am

      You seriously made my day.
      xoxo

      Reply

      • phyllis
        February 23, 2016 @ 3:51 pm

        Jeanne, I would love to read some of those conversations…can you link it right here?
        Victoria, I trust your gut instincts. Even thinking about starting a GoFundMe for your gft habit! Why not?

        Reply

  14. Yvonne Angus
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:37 am

    While I loved the LOOK of the white couch, especially at Christmas, with the GIANT red bows on the cushions, I did always feel it didn’t quite fit into your sense of STYLE. Read as old, giant, fancy, Victorian, sparkly and generally magnificent! Keep looking. I’m quite sure you’ll stumble into the perfect sofa, for FREE, kind of like the piano for your awesome island!

    Reply

  15. Gerry
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:46 am

    So anxious to see what you find to replace the sofa with. On another note, did I miss a post in which you might have revealed the finished piano island? If not, how can you keep us in such suspense? Please, show us this brilliant display of ingenuity!

    Reply

  16. teri
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:50 am

    lol and yes the ottoman has to go. Quickly.

    Reply

  17. Dawn
    February 23, 2016 @ 11:56 am

    What is this Arkansas Fund?? ARE YOU SELLING THE KINGDOM MIRROR??

    Reply

    • Mary
      February 23, 2016 @ 1:20 pm

      PLEASE don’t sell the Kingdom Mirror! It makes me feel happy that you have it and it is safe and sound in your house! You must not sell the Kingdom Mirror, the ottoman is another story!

      Reply

  18. cheapdiva
    February 23, 2016 @ 12:09 pm

    I have just signed papers to take on a new house – that needs lots of work! AND the paint color on your living room walls is what I need for my new “project”. Will you share?

    Reply

    • Victoria Elizabeth Barnes
      February 23, 2016 @ 12:17 pm

      Eggnog by Behr. It’s a light yellow. I looked at 47,000 shades of paint, so I feel confident endorsing it as the ultimate wall color.

      Depending on the light or time of day, it might look white or cream in the photos, but it’s distinctly yellow, especially next to white trim.

      More photos in my FAQ post: http://victoriaelizabethbarnes.com/red-front-door-paint-and-faq/

      Reply

    • Suzen
      February 23, 2016 @ 8:54 pm

      Just in case you want another lighter hue, I have been using Pam’s Lace by Valspar. It’s a cream that also changes with the light and looks good with white trim. Good luck! I’m nearing the end of singlehandedly painting our 1900 square ft Victorian.

      Reply

  19. Cricket
    February 23, 2016 @ 12:11 pm

    The ottoman has to go. I am sure you are aware that some of the older chairs and sofas have horse hair in them.

    Reply

  20. Jessica
    February 23, 2016 @ 12:19 pm

    I just wanted to put your mind at ease a bit and explain that PETA greatly exaggerates. Live-plucking is actually a pretty rare practice. It is illegal in most countries and is actually twice as expensive as simply using the feathers that are a by-product of the food-processing industry. Since most companies are all about cutting expenses, they would be very unlikely to use live-plucking.

    Happy GFT hunting!

    Reply

    • Rachel
      February 23, 2016 @ 12:42 pm

      Live-plucking is *not* rare. I’m not sure where you are getting that information.

      *Over* 50% of down (and leather, fur, angora) sold in America comes from China where they have zero animal welfare regulations. (Google bear bile farms and you will see the extent to which China is comfortable abusing animals.)

      Reply

    • Suzen
      February 23, 2016 @ 8:56 pm

      There’s “down alternative” which is actually more comfortable, in my opinion and hypoallergenic to boot.

      Reply

      • Debbie Klausing
        February 23, 2016 @ 11:10 pm

        Love down alternative! Those puffer coats totally overwhelm me, like they are on steroids! Down alternative comforters are wonderful also, in my opinion.

        Reply

    • Abby Bean
      February 28, 2017 @ 11:59 am

      PETA has a lot of faults, but exaggerating animal abuse is not one of them. Incidentally, animals are not ours to use- so whether down feathers are “live-plucked,” or what you callously refer to as a byproduct, they are abhorrent and unnecessary.

      Reply

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