1. Helen
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:10 am

    I’m becoming concerned about your new addiction. Do we need to stage an intervention??


    • Cheapdiva
      February 25, 2015 @ 10:20 am

      NO, NO INTERVENTION!!! How will VEB keep us entertained if there is an intervention?


  2. Kimberly
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:17 am

    Laughing out loud!!! I love your blog, your photos, your decorating style, your writing style…I’m so glad to have a friend who introduced me to you! I even went to the beginning so I could really get to know you. Also, this is not meant to sound quite so stalkery…


  3. Vickie
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:18 am

    I absolutely adore you and your madness. I’m living through you. I want to be at the auctions but I’m making an international move and right now I cannot buy anything I don’t want to pay to move across the ocean. Thankfully, through the internet, I’m taking you with me!!! We’re headed from sunny Arizona to very cold Germany.


  4. Ann
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:18 am

    Too funny! You have more resolve than I. Or a MUCH MORE persuasive acquisition troll. I’m glad it all worked out, and these two items have found their rightful home.


  5. Ashley
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:26 am

    I love this! You are my hero:) Went to an auction little over a week ago and bought a bronze lion…for $325.00. The adrenaline was pumping – and when we actually got it (because that’s why we went) I wanted to stand up and cheer! Wasn’t planning on spending quite that much though….oh well:)


  6. Bleubook
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:26 am

    I used to work at Freeman’s auction house…we just LOVED bidders like you. 😉


  7. Monica W
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:39 am

    He *could* know Jax Teller.

    He could also be from a rival gang who supports their gun running with antiques by shipping them on semi trailers and would kill Jax Teller.

    All for the want of a bookcase.


  8. Carol
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:40 am

    Love the image of the acquisition troll wearing 80s style headband and legwarmers! So Flash-dancy!


  9. Linda @ It All Started With Paint
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:44 am

    And THAT is why I don’t go to auctions. Because I fear I will end up buying the wrong thing. Or spending too much $$$ on the wrong thing! Oh, who am I kidding. I have not room for antiques in my little house!

    🙂 Linda


  10. Stephanie
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:49 am

    I got into a bidding war at an auction for an antique soup tureen that looked like it matched my china perfectly. Once I got it home, I found out it was a chamber pot. I guess every auction has it’s dummy.


    • S
      February 25, 2015 @ 5:51 pm

      Oh that is too funny!!


  11. Brenda Schweder
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:50 am

    “Then I had to flail my arms EXTRA idiotically.”
    I read your post five minutes ago. I am still laughing. Out loud. With tears rolling down my cheeks! You had me at “It looks like a Kingdom.” and I’ll forever be yours! (Don’t tell my husband!) LOL!


  12. Diane
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:52 am

    Your Paul sounds like an incredible person to allow you to flourish as your true self but to offer leaving work when he thought maybe you’d maybe lost it a bit. I am glad you got the bookcase, its a beauty!


  13. DB
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:53 am

    OK, V, we need to discuss “negative space.” DB


  14. Carla
    February 25, 2015 @ 10:53 am

    Hahahahahahahahahaha Oh my gosh. Hahaha Your the best.


  15. Ann Campos
    February 25, 2015 @ 11:13 am

    I’m right there with you…with tears in my eyes from laughing…what is it with people who drive all the way out to an auction to bid on boxes of canes and coat hangers, while leaving enamel bread tins, Louis XV chairs, industrial goodness, rockin’ vintage tchotchkes, and such behind? My favorite auction purchases are $1 Adirondack chair that nobody wanted, $.25 (yes, 25 cents) velvet armchair with ornate trim, $11 jack-o-lope, and $4 box of board games because I had to have the “Mystery Date” game to give a girlfriend…remember Mystery Date…you were dreamy eyed for the ski bum, but always got the nerdy dud!


  16. Linda Nelson
    February 25, 2015 @ 11:14 am

    I inherited that same bread box; you will get great use out of yours. I keep folded dish towels inside mine. Not sure if it’s a curse or a blessing that you have these wonderful auctions in your area. I often forget how I came to the conclusion of absolutely needing some of the things that I’ve acquired. But, I do need them. Really. It’s true.


  17. Missy
    February 25, 2015 @ 11:16 am

    My brother is an auctioneer. Mostly cattle, farm land, farm equipment, farm tools and farm trucks and what I call ‘old lady farm hoards’. These auctions are amazing for the shear amount of stuff that can fit inside a 3 bedroom house out in the middle of nowhere. I have been to many ‘trash’ auctions and because the guys don’t necessarily like auctioning off these things, and because they take a sweet forever, you have to become friends with the runners. The guys who move the auction along. They travel down the mile long row of tables set up, holding up items for the bidders to see. It does become a party. And you have to party with them to move your item up the row. Most of them will do it because they like the inner-action with the bidders. So next time get friendly with a runner or have Paul get friendly with a runner and just point out things you like and ask them to move them on the table. I also saw a bookcase almost identical to the one you won on my craigslist the other day for $75. And I ignored the call of Craig. And Inquired too late as to its status. And did not get to Win because somebody else Won. And my bookcase Troll needs to step up her game if I ever have a chance of accumulating GFT’s.


  18. Garden, Home and Party
    February 25, 2015 @ 11:18 am

    You are really getting good at this…maybe you should write a ‘how to’ book for those of us that have never been to an auction! I love the bookcase.
    P.S. I love how the mere mention of garden tools in your blog brought up “you might be interested in” the spade you gave away. I love that spade!


  19. tammigirl
    February 25, 2015 @ 11:31 am

    I’m right on top of that, Rose!


  20. Ginny Bryan
    February 25, 2015 @ 11:33 am

    You know you are my hero, right? And your husband is an angel! Can he give auction angel lessons to the rest of our husbands?


  21. Peazy Monellon
    February 25, 2015 @ 11:51 am

    So proud of you! (sniff…) 🙂


  22. judy
    February 25, 2015 @ 12:02 pm

    Oh boy……..I remember your posts where you were unfamiliar with Auctions and now!!!!!

    Thankfully you have all the skills and a partner to pull off the latest flight of fancy and somehow the end result is Genius…..lovely…….fits perfectly into your décor and further endears you to all of us ,your friends and family and possibly everyone you meet. There is no way you have the slightest DNA element of Dummy. Magician absolutely……..Dummy? Absolutely not.


  23. Sharon
    February 25, 2015 @ 12:04 pm

    You are my shero because you act out my impulsive thinking. I am still giggling. Love that you got the enamel box and the bookcase is to die for. Paul’s reaction is priceless. Thanks for sharing your escapades and the chuckle.


  24. Flymoma42
    February 25, 2015 @ 12:23 pm

    Every time I read one of your blogs I think, “FINALLY, someone who thinks just like ME!” You validate me!!! Ummm, truthfully, we’re probably just victims of severe ADD/ADHD, but what the hell, look how much you get accomplished. TWO auctions at the same time? I’d have done it but never had the guts to admit it to anyone. Oh, and one more thing: NO INTERVENTION! I’m having too much fun reading about your adventures! Soldier on! You too, little troll!


  25. chris aka monkey
    February 25, 2015 @ 12:38 pm

    you just plain dam crack me up xx


  26. julian
    February 25, 2015 @ 1:08 pm

    Congratulations! I stood up and cheered when I won a crow-caller at an auction and was deemed the madman for the rest of the auction – sounds like you did super great.


  27. Kristin
    February 25, 2015 @ 1:18 pm

    OMG. You know where you said this: “It is likely that this is also what meth addicts tell themselves: that they are mastering a skill.” I have a story for you. And it might be longer than a comment should be, but it’s SO worth it (at least, I think it is).

    OK, so. I used to be married to this guy who, it turns out, was a mess. He didn’t work (often) but I worked AND was going to college (in my 30s). During one of his periods of unemployment (after getting fired for stealing AND for buying the company owner’s teenaged son beer — could I even make this up?), his behavior became more and more erratic. So, at one point, he didn’t come home one night. When I woke up in the morning and realized he hadn’t come home, I was like, hmmm. Weird. But I didn’t freak out.

    So, off I went to work (at the prosecutor’s office). And then class (law school). I got home around 10. House was empty. Wow. Weird. (If I recall correctly, his cell was going straight to voicemail.) Now I was getting angry/slightly concerned. I wound up dozing, off and on, on the couch, so I would be right there, front and center, when he stumbled in the door. Ohhh, I was locked and loaded, totally ready for this confrontation. Because, clearly, he was having an affair (although I couldn’t imagine what type of woman he could manage to seduce at this point).

    Around 6am, he stepped through the door, and I was dozing on the couch. He tried to tiptoe past me. I popped up and was like, “Whoa!! Where are YOU going?” And he was like (I kid you not): “I’m just stopping by to shower and change, someone’s waiting on me. You go back to sleep, I didn’t mean to wake you.” (I’m paraphrasing.) I was like, “WHAT?? You haven’t been home in TWO days and you’re here to get changed?? You’re kidding, right?”

    He then copped an attitude and was muttering something about how he was no longer going to live under my thumb, and how I was a control freak (I don’t keep people under my thumb, but I might be a control freak). For some reason (lack of sleep, being overworked, the stress of law school, having a horrible husband, who knows?), I started crying and was blabbering about how I knew he was having an affair.

    He was stunned, and immediately softened, and sat next to me, to comfort me and assure me he was not cheating on me. He was like, “Oh my God, how could you think that?? Oh my God…” So I was like (yeah, I know I say “like” a lot), “But what else could be going on when you don’t come home for two days?” And he goes…

    “Well, if you really want to know…I’ve been learning how to make meth.”

    *pregnant pause*

    “You…are…making…meth. You’ve decided to become a ******* meth cook? While I go to work…AT THE PROSECUTOR’S OFFICE? AND AM PREPARING TO BECOME A LAWYER?”

    He said, “No, it’s not like that. See?!?! I knew you’d be all judgmental! This is why I don’t tell you things!! No, I’m learning the “science” of it. Like the chemistry behind it. A recipe. Not some pathetic meth lab in a hotel room. This is much more than that.”

    Indeed it is. It’s called “grounds for divorce.”

    P.S. You’re my Craigslist/auction idol. 🙂


    • Sherry
      February 25, 2015 @ 6:00 pm

      Great story!


  28. JEDDA
    February 25, 2015 @ 1:33 pm

    Don’t you just love box lots? It takes some serious shady scrounging through the boxes before the early morning bidding to find the prizes, though. You can get great stuff for just a few bucks and then find out that the people bidding against you wanted the stuffed pink poodle or the dozen coat hangers and you can sell them on the spot, keep the thingy you wanted and make money, as you found out. My china, etched stemware, fancy serving bowls and table linens were all gleaned from box lots. I toast my holiday table recalling how cheap it all was and what fun the treasure hunt was, too. Auctions are the mother lode. Love to hear your adventures. Have fun and keep at it.


  29. Becky
    February 25, 2015 @ 2:41 pm

    I love this so much. Nothing like some good antique pieces from the 80s and a dish rack to complete the auction process.


  30. maggie b
    February 25, 2015 @ 2:48 pm

    What a find! What a great deal on the enameled pan! However, I must know what the book case ended up costing!


    • Victoria Elizabeth Barnes
      February 25, 2015 @ 6:12 pm

      $180/$217 w/ tax and buyer’s fee… (I had to stick it in a caption because there was not room for one more word in this story.)


      • maggie b
        February 26, 2015 @ 8:33 am

        What a bargain! You are the auction queen!


  31. Jan Garon
    February 25, 2015 @ 3:30 pm

    You are absolutely the funniest! And you scored big time! Can’t wait to see your next adventure!


  32. Amber
    February 25, 2015 @ 4:46 pm

    your blog is an endless source of entertainment to me – if I lived closer I would make you my best friend lol 🙂 p.s. i LOVE the enamel bin, and the bookcase (are you selling the white one with the cake plates?)


  33. Patty/NS
    February 25, 2015 @ 4:51 pm

    OMG we are soul sisters, a country between us, I just know it! I am in Craigslist and Kijiji rehab now, forbidden to bring one more thing through the ‘effing door. So I live through your adventures now. Besides, I’ve aged and can’t haul it like I used to. You GO girl!!!!


  34. Teresa
    February 25, 2015 @ 4:52 pm

    The acquisition troll – that cracks me up every time. You need to describe her to a police sketch artist so we can see what she looks like. Love the bookcase & the enamel breadbox. You and the acquisition troll win the gold for the Auction Olympics.


  35. Wilma Galanos
    February 25, 2015 @ 5:32 pm

    Thank you so much much for your wonderful humor. I do look forward to your posts.


  36. Sherry
    February 25, 2015 @ 6:02 pm

    Great post, as always. And this time some of the comments are almost as funny. Love it!


  37. Nancy
    February 25, 2015 @ 6:46 pm

    hahaha, you are hysterical ! I pay a guy to bid for me, I am awful at auctions!


  38. Kate S.
    February 25, 2015 @ 6:51 pm

    I would normally be censorious about what seems like haphazard acquisition of things, but in light of the fact that that bookcase is AH-MAZING, I am in favor of your continued auction-shopping. If we found items like that at our local auctions, I may just end up with an acquisition troll of my own!


  39. Rita C at Panoply
    February 25, 2015 @ 6:51 pm

    Nice finds!
    Oh my, I know EXACTLY all the things you have described here. I get so wound up on auction days that I literally cannot sleep those nights. My mind continuously goes through the day’s events, I recount all that I bought, and I’ve even been known to get out of bed to check my sales list if I can’t reconcile it while lying in bed.

    Multi-ring auctions are the worst (except for traveling back & forth from auction houses, lol). You’re right – it’s so much more fun to be there and bid vs the absentee.

    Lucky you they didn’t make you take the 1983 stereo system! We’ve all been there, done that. And isn’t it a blast when you sell right after a win and make $$?! I’ve done that too – what a rush (or, second guessing yourself as to why someone else wants it, oh hey, maybe I want it, that would make a really cool collection sort of way).
    Rita C at Panoply


  40. Stephanie Hobson
    February 25, 2015 @ 7:36 pm

    I want a cane. A really cool cane, maybe topped with a silver skull, or an eagle, or something else just as splendid. I am getting to the age where I can justify having one, so I can poke my grandkids (and other peoples grandkids) with it when they are unruly.


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