Every fall, our neighborhood has a town-wide yard sale. I wake up that morning feeling like I have been injected with pure meth: excited. I love being able to roll out of bed, walk out the front door, and start yardsale-ing RIGHT AWAY… no traveling, no wasted time, no waiting.
It’s not unusual for me to be one or two houses ahead of Paul because I like to yardsale FAST… I have anxiety that other people are beating me to the good stuff, so I try to go twice as fast as everyone else.
Paul on the other hand, likes to talk to the neighbors and his leisurely, garden-party-mentality makes me insane… This is not a social event. This is war. Someone will win, I would like it to be me.
Some years I get something really fantastic. Like a four-tier barrister bookcase for $30… Is it in pristine condition? No. But it’s totally intact and at 2-feet distance, it looks perfect.
Some years I don’t get anything big or notable but I always come away with a good combination of smaller things: dishes, vintage jewelry… crap I do not need but cannot leave behind… stuff Paul tries to talk me out of but fails.
Last year that category was occupied by these Victrola boxes. When I asked how much, the guy said– one is $5… but you can have the other two for free.
Clearly, a bargain.
Finding broken-useless-stuff makes me kind of manic. So my thought process was– for five dollars, why would we not buy these?
Paul said – so that we have five dollars, instead of a pile of junk?
I was like– umm… nope.
Paul said– well, why don’t you just get one? Then, if you find that you NEED three, you can get more.
And I was like– right, you must be confusing me with your other wife. She sounds great.
Besides, I explained – just getting one doesn’t make any sense. We need to get them all… So that I can store them in the garage along with all of the other things I have bought that I will never refinish or repair or do ANYTHING with… but pretend I will so that you cannot throw them away.
I will love you EVEN MORE… If you share me with your friends.