Who is this woman Pilar Guzman? How did she steal my DREAM KITCHEN?
I love a high-concept idea.
I love something big and wild and fancy and shiny and possibly covered in gold leaf… I love anything oversized or ornate or weird or unusual, or marble, or unexpected.
Which is why I need Pilar Guzman’s kitchen.
As a special kind of torture, there are no photos anywhere of the entire kitchen.
Some obsessive-searching on the internet, turned up a video on the NY Times website that gives a too-brief tour of the house, prior to its renovation… if you have any interest in feeling like your own house is a shack, you should watch it.
I personally was torn between raving envy… and glee, that I FINALLY got to see more of the kitchen.
I showed Paul– in a blaze of accomplishment… THIS! This is it! I have SOLVED our kitchen design dilemma!!
Do I need to explain? How this is my dream kitchen? How this is EVERYTHING I could possibly want? And how, in comparison, I CANNOT be happy with some cabinets from Home Depot? Do I need to explain that to you?
Do I also need to explain that this would make our house AWESOME?
And that now my goal in life is to make something kind of similar. With… some, um, wood. And uh, glass. And, um… some reclaimed stuff from the salvage place?
It would be a DIY masterpiece.
It would CERTAINLY look JUST LIKE THIS.
Except? Paul? Does NOT think this is the solution to all our kitchen problems.
What is wrong with him?
What is wrong with ME? That I did not beat Pilar to HER husband… who is clearly a superior brand of kitchen-loving person.
Paul assures me that if we build this, it will NOT be awesome… On the contrary— it will look like a total hack job.
That if we do this, we are no better than Steve, the previous owner… He of the mini-island, and the abstract brick sculptures. And the grand ideas and crazy designs and “custom” cabinets, and no sense of reality.
Paul says that in my mind it will be appealing… but to everyone else, it will look like crap. That the chasm between what is in my head, and what will actually be, is too large.
He said that it is a project of such ridiculous scope and detail, that it would drive us both crazy.
Which? Aren’t we used to that?
Why stop now?
He said—do you have any other ideas?
And I was like—I DO!
I’m SO GLAD YOU ASKED.
Have a seat… you will be amazed at all the inspiration photos I have! FANCY OPEN SHELVING! orANTIQUE CABINETS REPURPOSED INTO KITCHENS! or BUNGALOW KITCHENS BUT MAKE IT CASTLES! ARE YOU INSPIRED?!
Like this! Such a simple design! Just some glass front doors! And some crown molding! And some antique hardware! How hard would THAT be?
NOT hard at all!!
Paul was like—you realize those are at least fourteen-foot ceilings?
You realize that hardware isn’t something we can buy?
You realize I am not a cabinetmaker?
And I was like—you’re being too literal… I’m suggesting an interpretation. Not an exact replica. AND? You said that same thing about our DIY medicine cabinet! And look how that turned out!!
Paul was like, that was one, four-foot cabinet. You’re talking about building a truly custom design… Please understand that is an entirely different project.
But surely YOU see? Right? We are going to do an entire wall of cabinets somewhere here… why not make it a wall of AWESOME cabinets?
A wall of glorious, fancy, carved, dark wood? With shiny glass?
WHY? Would we do anything else?
Ugh.
It’s like I forget how terrible it is… until I see a picture.
Like in my head, I’ve redesigned it to be a Victorian brownstone, and am actually confused why that isn’t the case.
If you missed our crazy kitchen design:
Here is Part 1, Part 2, Part 3.
giant Victorian wardrobe I scored on craigslist!
I’ll love you even more… if you share me with your friends!
Amanda
April 19, 2016 @ 12:54 pm
I just found this blog through the Facebook page For the Love of Old Houses and I LOVE it. We are currently renovating our 1920s house while living in it – for the past three years. I feel your pain. I have to say though your kitchen has nothing on ours when we moved in. Handmade wall cabinets 6″ deep – nothing fit in them and they were the only cabinets in the kitchen. The over the fridge cabinet, that since the fridge was too tall he just cut out the bottom of it – leaving a door covering one shelf and nothingness. My 18″ of counter space. And the piece d’resistance – 1970s wood panelling – on the floor. Why anyone would think 1″ deep groves on the kitchen floor was a good idea I will never know.
Nan
February 11, 2017 @ 10:57 pm
Discovered you today and… well, I had no idea I had such a soul mate running around the world demanding Craigslist and the husband deliver the world on her doorstep (or making yourself easy and picking up NOW. I have cash. I am Shera so I can move it myself if my husband argues the wisdom of it.) Holy crap, you’re hysterical! I feel like I discovered my girl, Ree Drummond, all over again. (yeah… that Ree Drummond. I’m special.) Now I sorta feel like I need to meet you.
michelle
November 9, 2017 @ 11:26 pm
i actually like your current kitchen. maybe a different color but that’s an easy fix. and it’s all the rage right now (look up “plain english kitchen” and “british standard kitchen”.).
you definitely need to upgrade the husband though.
World Mining
April 25, 2018 @ 1:24 pm
Hi there just wanted to give you a quick heds up. The text in your content
Vicki Cochran
April 6, 2023 @ 11:52 am
Thank you, Victoria, for your sense of humor in addressing your kitchen dilemma. I just found your posts and home, I wonder what has transpired in the last ten years. We are 36 years (half of our lives) into a naive 10-year plan for our 1905 home. I’ love wall cabinets similar to yours to incorporate into a “quick” shift to an unfitted kitchen from our 2003 never-quite-right (or finished) DIY. As you stated, real life often trumps house dreams. Adoptions, health and a yo-yo local economy have dimmed my simple but grandiose house dreams. In retrospect, those dreams are so dated and dwarfed by unanticipated blessings, including just surviving real life, that they’re back in the fun/fantasy category. Thank you again for your uplifting approach to old-house survival!