Where I’ve been: sad.
Elvis has stomach cancer.
It will be terminal.
I have been wanting to write this post since her diagnosis, but it took me a while to crawl out of the sadness cave.
Figuring out what was wrong with her took a while. Lots of vet visits. Lots of blood work. X-rays. Ultrasounds. Allergy trials. Vet specialty hospitals. Endoscopy.
The official report:
Elvis is an eleven/twelveish-year-old female cat, with large-cell, gastric lymphoma.
Her treatment is chemotherapy, with daily doses of steroids.
The hope is that the chemo will induce a period of remission… although there is no hope of curing the kind of lymphoma that she has. At some point the cancer will become resistant to the chemotherapy, and she will come out of remission.
I think that chemo seems questionable to anyone who has ever watched a human loved one endure it… but it turns out that the goal of veterinary chemotherapy is different than human chemotherapy.
In people, the goal is to completely and aggressively eradicate all of the cancer. But in animals the goal is different– the concern of preserving their quality of life is equivalent to treating the cancer.
Elvis is seeing a veterinary oncologist and she explained that people are generally surprised at how well their animals do on chemotherapy… and for the most part, I would agree.
Right now Elvis has more good days than bad days, but the bad days are a bleak reminder that the good days are just a pitstop.
Her good days make me thankful— that she is here now, and hopefully for longer… I am thankful she is responding to the treatment and tolerating it acceptably, and thankful for the doctor and the oncology nurses who are so wonderful.
This is not at all the post I wanted to write.
I’ve written 57 versions of it to try to tell you how much I love Elvis. How she is my favorite thing in the entire world. How she has the sweetest heart of anyone I know. How my satisfaction rate with her is 100%. How it is not very often you get the very best thing in the universe.
And none of the versions are right. Because they do not reach through your screen and put Elvis on your lap, so you can feel her fur; which is superior.
Or see how she drools when you pet her. Or how she likes to sleep inside your clothing— while you are wearing it.
Or the way she likes to tell you how her day was. And how she will come and stand on her hind legs so that you will pick her up.
How she believes there is never NOT room on your lap.
And how she will come up and paw the covers at your neck so you will let her under… then she purrs as loud as possible while madly kneading your arm and drooling.
Elvis is my family in every sense of the word.
August 18, 2015 @ 12:53 pm
I’ve been wondering where you were and am sorry to know the reason, but glad you have been spending time worshiping at the feet of your precious. I have been through this so many times, and have decided that I can’t go through it again… it tears such a gaping hole in your heart. It’s worth it, oh so worth it, but I have enough paw prints on my heart and in my memories now.
Sending love and hugs and wee, soft scratches for Elvis’ favorite spots….
August 18, 2015 @ 12:59 pm
Hugs to you and Elvis fom Iowa where 13 year old Hoover and 8 year old DC wish their feline compatriot many more snuggles and catnip and love.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:01 pm
I’m so sorry about poor Elvis. Please always remember what a wonderful and loving home you have given her. She certainly knows as evidenced by the love and happiness she has given you. Hugs to your family.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:03 pm
I loved the sentiment quote Fl!p Breskin shared:
“I’ve heard we die three times.
The first is when we stop breathing
The next is when the last person who held us in living memory goes
The third is when our stories are no longer told.
Elvis has a while yet….”
I do genealogy research for fun and that really resonated with me. Perhaps pets as soul mates were gifted to remind us that life is finite and to love and enjoy it to the fullest. Sometimes I have a hard time coming up with blessings to count, but you’all just reminded me. My black cat, “Blue”, has the softest blue black rabbit fur coat. His brother, “Red”, had the same coat with a red cast and just the sweetest heart-shaped face and voice. Both Red & Blue had golden eyes and looked like twin statues of the Egyptian cats. I often think about Red, though it’s been 4 years since he disappeared. I’d never had cats that drooled before and thought that was strange. I recently adopted another delicate old mama who has a fluffy coat of siamese cream/brown coloring and blue eyes. She was just too precious not to be treasured. Mischief aka Missy, lays limp and heavy as a ragdoll when you pick her up. Though she’s small, her weight belies her frame, and underneath all that hair you feel a lean and muscular body. Perhaps she was undernourished because in the past few months she went from being a very quiet and still cat to racing through the house over and under furniture with joy de vivre, as if she’s feeling such energy it simply can’t be contained. (In that regard she reminds me of you Victoria.) She’s my armpit cat, left side only if you please, and Blue is the neck/lap cat; two blessings I’ve been taking for granted until I saw your post and all the comments of other cat/dog lovers. So thank you for sharing your sadness. Bless Elvis and his specialness.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:08 pm
Your post was poetic justice. It made me fall head over heels in love with Elvis and absolutely heartbroken that she isn’t well. My thoughts are with you all!
August 18, 2015 @ 1:18 pm
I’m so sorry! The special relationship is so difficult to understand or contemplate going on with out any precious soul we have shared so much with! Know this: Elvis has returned to the Creator of all life, not gone, but rather waiting for you with the Creator of all living things! Peace to you!
August 18, 2015 @ 1:25 pm
My heart breaks for you.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:25 pm
I understand, and I am so very sorry about Elvis–but glad at the same time, that she is doing well on her treatment. I believe every animal lover has one perfect pet soul mate, and Elvis is obviously yours. Mine is a buff Cocker Spaniel named Patches with big, sweet brown eyes and curly ear fur. He owns my heart completely.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:26 pm
I’m so sorry honey. It sucks. Fuck cancer. Kiss Elvis. She knows how much she is loved.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:27 pm
So sorry for your sad news. My 11 year old dog was just diagnosed with glaucoma. While not fatal, he will eventually go blind 🙁 While Elvis is the perfect cat, he is the perfect dog and this diagnosis puts me one step closer to having to imagine the world without him. Hugs through the internet…
August 18, 2015 @ 1:29 pm
Elvis is a very lucky cat to have such a Mom as you!!
August 18, 2015 @ 1:29 pm
I can’t begin to tell you how much I feel for you. I have opened my heart and my bankbook for my dogs because I feel that it is my obligation to care for them in any way that I can. I’ve taken out home equity loans to pay for surguries and other veterinary care for Sugar, Hooper and Maddie. People think I’m mad as a hatter I’m sure, spending all that money and effort “on a dog”. Those people have no real idea of the unconditional love that a dog or cat can give and the way they truly become part of the family. We are blessed to be their caretakers.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:30 pm
Thank you for your lovely heartfelt post. I lost my soul-cat, Elwood, 2 years ago to cancer, and not a day goes by that I do not miss him. You and Elvis are in my thoughts. You are both so lucky to have had such a good, long time together. Big hug.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:31 pm
I am so sorry to hear your sweet kitty is unwell. She seems to be a lot like my beloved Oscar Snuggles, King of Tidewater.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:34 pm
I am sooooo sorry!! Enjoy every single minute you can with her and remember: forever and ever she will always be your beautiful, amazing kitty and you will always be her loving Mom and that this kind of love never ends!!
August 18, 2015 @ 1:34 pm
Never commented before, knew it was something really bad. We have 4 inside kitties.
Willie is the drooler. Don’t know what we will do when we lose any one of them, they are all family. My heart goes out to you. So happy Elvis has love and comfort.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:39 pm
This made me cry out loud thinking of my dog, my Bessie ………Besssinia, who was put down at 15 years old after suffering from a stroke. I found out the day after my birthday. I was on deployment on an aircraft carrier and I sent her to stay with my mom at a farmhouse in Kentucky. I don’t know if it happened on my birthday or if it was the day after. I miss her so much and it has been almost three years now.
Your Elvis looks like the sweetest thing in the world. He looks like he makes everyday Christmas day or the perfect rainy Sunday with your favorite movie and throw blanket.
I understand all of the measures you are taking. I was very into probiotics and supplements for Bessie. I know cats also respond very well to probiotics. I would suggest seeing a nutritionist or a holistic foods practioner for him. It can only help in a positive way. I can only help by suggesting this. Thank you so much for sharing. I know how difficult it is.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:45 pm
Oh, my dear girl. I am crying with you. This is a day I dread more than my own death. I have two beautiful fur babies whom I love with all my heart. Your sweet Elvis is a darling little girl, and I know she feels your love. Sending prayers for you for peace and comfort. I’m so sorry.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:51 pm
I am so sorry to read this. I don’t know exactly how you feel, but I’ve been through it. I had the world’s second-sweetest tuxedo cat for 10 years. (She was six when I got her.) Her name was Abby. She also died of what the vet suspected as cancer. I opted against the mandible-ectomy, though.
August 18, 2015 @ 1:57 pm
i’m so sad for you, and for Elvis to have to do this. Hugs and kneading to you. (((( ))))