Holiday house tour – a giant fancy Christmas.

Index of all holiday decorating posts.

Last year was my first real blog Christmas. And I went AT IT.

By mid-December, I was lying on the floor, buried under an avalanche of my own making… Crushed by garland and glitter and DIY giant snowflakes and a truck-load of disco balls and a trash-picked sled and yards-and-yards-and-YARDS-of-fabric-I-had-mistakenly-thought-that-Paul-could-help-me-sew-into-bows.

There is no end to my creativity when the other option is doing actual work.

Wow. This is totally fascinating… keep reading.

Holiday gift guide— AND a giant fancy giveaway.

I hate getting presents.
It’s an extension of my fundamental hatred of surprises.

And if I want to extrapolate that to a deeper level of self-analysis: my hatred of surprises is actually a hatred of other people’s expectations.

I hate all surprises. At all times. From all people.
Unless you are giving me a kitten.

In which case, thank you. But I cannot accept it… I can only accept gifts of stray, elderly cats with medical issues.

However, since now is the time of year when we are socially obligated to participate in joyful gift-giving, and I am obligated by blogger code to speak of nothing but the holidays and how I graciously bring warmth and elegancy (not a word? Think again.) to every element… I decided to do a gift guide.

(If you’re only here for the shiny giveaway, you’d better just go ahead and scroll already.)

vintage christmas ads

a scale? let me know how that works out for you…  Ladies Home Journal, 1955 Colt ad, Joelle Jones

Wow. This is totally fascinating… keep reading.

Whoever said less is more… clearly never had enough more.

If you have been reading me for a while, you remember my giant pearl necklace of invincibility.

The way it works is that it is so giant and irritating, that the entire time you are wearing it you are distracted from anything that might give you anxiety, intimidate you, or make you feel less-than.

You will never wonder if people are judging you or looking at you weird, because they are.

But you get to decide what for.

DIY double pearl earrings… Dior knockoff and other giant pearl jewelry!

hanging out with Diana. I am the subtle one, incase you were confused.

*aside* I am so tempted to run the retouching brush over the corner of my eye where it is weirdly lumpy… but I am still debating how much of an ass I want the internet to allow me to become. *end aside*
Wow. This is totally fascinating… keep reading.