Kitchen FAQ: weird windows, NO HOOD, cooktop in the island?
This post is just facts and boring, so if you are only here for the fancy, save yourself and bail now.
If you missed:
I got another massive mirror… it’s going in the kitchen, so now the previous layout plan is in upheaval because I axed a wall of cabinets to make room.
FAQ #1:
HOW are we going to vent the cooktop now that it is going in the piano island?
Easy!
We’re not!
Here is my post about my pure burning hatred of range hoods and why I am not having one.
Common misconception that it’s a necessity to meet code… some places, sure; but not our township, and besides we are doing induction so there is no “safety” reason for us to vent.
Frying bacon is also not an issue for us because bacon has been classified as a Group 1 carcinogen… Group 1 is: cigarettes and other things we KNOW FOR SURE cause cancer.
I personally need to stay alive as long as possible.
Once I am dead, other people will be allowed to touch my things.
BACK OFF.
FAQ #2: those windows must drive you crazy!
I’m already crazy… maybe that is why I think they are fine?
This is an old house… I do not want to erase the quirks.
Even though I can be particular about symmetry, I am only concerned about the symmetry of the choices I make in this century… However! The above photo really emphasizes the difference; look below, then I will explain more.
The way you enter the kitchen, the smaller window is not in your initial line of sight because of the angle.
The two big windows with the red arrow (above), mirror each other and are identical– so we would not change the big one.
The smaller window is going to be associated with the sink area– the countertop will run into the wall under that window… so the sill cannot be lowered to meet the big one.
I am left with the option of lowering the height of the one that goes all the way to the ceiling; we could bring it down to match the other ones… but that has no appeal for me.
For me, more light > less light… always. Easy decision.
So.
I understand you think it is horrible!
But hopefully, now you better understand the horror!
the mirror will be mounted right up to the ceiling, flush against the wall
Next.
FAQ #3: COOKTOP IN THE ISLAND.
Some all of you felt– WHAT!? BLARGH!! NOOOOOOOO…
I HEAR YOU.
And I’m doing it anyway.
if you missed: we hid the fridge, and our kitchen island is a repurposed antique grand piano.
BUT.
I’ve gone back to insetting the cooktop… there are examples in my first post on induction, at the time, your comments talked me out of it… but now am revisiting.
I’ll explain (far more than you wish to know), once I finish my research… we are DIY-ing the entire countertop AND IT WAS FREE… if something breaks or gets ruined, not a crisis.
FAQ #4: why preserve the mirror but repurpose the piano? also you already have enough mirrors. stop buying mirrors you are stupid.
Important distinction going forward:
I am not collecting mirrors… I’m collecting GIANT CARVED ORNAMENTS FOR MY SOUL… the glass is just white space for the frame– it EMPHASIZES THE FANCY.
I wrote a post about the some 57,000 pianos avaliable on Craigslist any given day… so if you are upset that I “ruined” an antique, would it have been better to let it go to the dump?!
Pianos are plentiful! EVEN THE FANCY ONES! I could go get a FREE antique square grand piano on Craigslist, any day of the week and twice on Sundays… it would be driving and effort! But FREE.
I cannot go anywhere. Ever. For any amount of money. To get a monster visual representation of my soul that is LITERALLY THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN.
I am still planning to mount the lady head mirror over the sink, but I’m going to need to see her in the space before I can tell how much open shelving I want to crap it up with.
I have another idea for more storage in another location if we need it… I’m going to leave that for my storage post; because it’s not on this wall and doesn’t involve actual kitchen cabinets so is just me hoarding.
ABH— always be hoarding.
FAQ #4: Resale doomsday predictions.
We are not planning to move… but also: in the last few years, MORE THAN ONCE, we have been close to moving to Hawaii.
I am SUPER not into it but Paul would love nothing better, and I don’t want to be the person who ruins his life… so I cannot say what will happen.
Hopefully we don’t move soon.
But if we had to, maybe everyone would hate our kitchen.
That would be unfortunate.
But if I love it.
Maybe someone else will also love it.
Or maybe someone else adds a big range and hood… Wall B is exterior and will be easy to add cabinets and a range and tap right outside for a vent.
Or maybe this is the worst decision we ever make and we rue it until the day we die.
I did mention to Paul– the part about rueing until death.
But he said that he doesn’t think that the best way for us to make decisions, is to ask ourselves what we think other people think we should do.
So this seems to have been decided.
With some kind of logic.
Ok this post is over but.
important public service announcement.
they have made a movie JUST FOR ME.
I would strongly endorse seconds :27 – :40 of the below trailer.
you’re welcome.
but I have dibs on the guy at :35.
BACK OFF
After I watched 57 times, to be SURE that I UNDERSTOOD CORRECTLY, (and then stalked them all over the internet)… there is a Marine training center doing research to create superhuman special ops soldiers… and they JUST EAT PLANTS.
I have packed my bags.
I’ll send a postcard.
lol no I won’t.
It’s been real, yo!
Hopefully, this will be the movie I can hand people when they ask me where I “get” my protein.
I don’t know what people EXPECT me to say… but I know for a fact that they are disappointed when rather than screeching: REGURGITATED UNICORN GLITTER AND WATERMELON!!
I start with a basic overview of what “protein” even IS:
Protein consist of 20 different amino acids.
11 of which are made naturally by the body.
The other 9, are called essential amino acids.
They are all found in plants.
Essential amino acids are also found in meat and dairy BECAUSE THOSE ANIMALS EAT PLANTS… running your amino acids THROUGH ANIMALS before eating them is the very least efficient way of “getting” amino acids.
NOT TO MENTION, you get all of the cholesterol, hormones, pharmaceuticals, AND PESTICIDES… those animals are eating AN INSANE AMOUNT OF PESTICIDES HERBICIDES AND OTHER CRAP THEY FERTILIZE CROPS WITH… 80% of antibiotics used in the USA are GIVEN TO THE ANIMALS WE EAT… this stuff doesn’t DISAPPEAR… it concentrates in their flesh.
OH AND FECES.
Do you know that our government ALLOWS 100% of meat to have fecal contamination?
That sounds totally fine!
And delicious!
By now, people’s eyes have rolled back in their head… and I’m BAFFLED.
The meat and dairy industry has spent AN INSANE AMOUNT OF MONEY to CONVINCE US that we WANT to EAT POOP.
Do you THINK I WANT to type the word POOP on my blog?
I promise you, I DO NOT.
But.
The meat and dairy industry are intentionally DESTROYING FAMILIES.
They KNOW their product kills people.
Should I tell people?
OR WHO CARES THE PHARMACEUTICAL INDUSTRY IS HAPPY TO GIVE US ALL CHOLESTEROL MEDICATION… THE HOSPITALS ARE HAPPY TO TAKE OUR MONEY FOR HEART ATTACKS AND STROKES.
CANCER
DIABETES
DEATH
now I will light myself on fire and have a banana.
with a flourish, VEB
(internet enemy #1)
May 22, 2018 @ 8:52 pm
I’m with Paul and doing what you want in your house so that you all love it. I will say that my taste is not exactly yours, but I absolutely love your point-of-view and that you are doing your kitchen your way. I think it will be gorgeous for that reason! And someone else would definitely buy your house should you decide to move to Hawaii. No question on that point of resale. And I love that you ended your post “with a flourish”! Ha!
May 22, 2018 @ 9:54 pm
I have to say – that is one fabulous mirror, and I’m looking forward to seeing how your storage solution for the kitchen.
May 22, 2018 @ 10:22 pm
Victoria, I know I’m just a random faceless individual writing to you via the internet, but I want you to know that the things you say here make me think. I am not saying that you are changing my mind about my consumption of animal products, but you definitely are helping me to see that there are other ways of looking at it and they shouldn’t be dismissed without serious consideration. For that I sincerely thank you.
With regard to your kitchen, I hope it will be everything you dream of and more! It’s not the kitchen that I would make for myself, but it doesn’t need to be. Thank you for inviting the rest of us along for the Giant Fancy Adventure. Your creativity and your love for beautiful antiques is inspiring. I actually drew inspiration from my own DIY coffee-table-turned-kitchen-island project from your chronicles of the piano island. In summation, thanks for being you.
May 22, 2018 @ 11:32 pm
Hahahaha! You’re awesome!
May 23, 2018 @ 1:01 am
I hate your kitchen, but who gives a shit? Its your kitchen! You are an enigma, keep doing you. Also I dont really hate it, that was just for shock value. Im just not that in to wood that looks like ribbons, but the lady mirror does do it for me, in a platonic way of course.
May 23, 2018 @ 9:55 am
I love it. I think the piano island is genius. I do hate cooktops in islands. Why not put the range next to the sink, with 18″ of counter between? Would make having a pot filler easier.
Also, I am curious about the details of your floating shelves. I do hope they will be marble with an ogee edge and fancy metal brackets.
Love seeing this kitchen reno take shape!
May 23, 2018 @ 11:14 am
That’s going to be lovely, go for it!
May 23, 2018 @ 11:37 am
Ooooo! I am so excited for that movie! And sad that you already called dibs on the guy at 0:35. This is something I have been thinking about for a while, I’ve watched a lot of the Netflix documentaries on nutrition and this pretty much seals it for me (without even having seen the movie). Can you recommend any books on getting started? Do I need to read books on getting started or do I just start eating a bunch of fruits and veggies and good grains? Also, I have a 4 year old, so is there anything special I need to do to make sure she gets everything her growing body needs? (like so much beans or tofu or plant protein a day? and yes I did read what you said above but it is still a little confusing). I’ve honestly never been much of a meat eater anyway, so I really won’t even care that much, in fact I’ve been known to pick the meat out of my meal before LOL. Bacon is pretty good though, but I probably only have it like twice a year anyway so who cares? Also, I think the induction cooktop in the island is great, I myself would much rather face the room than the wall while I cook, I am curious to see what your storage solution is, maybe a fancy “Butler’s Pantry”?
May 23, 2018 @ 11:59 am
Looks cool to me. I have dreams of when I finally get a beautiful Georgian vacation apartment in Dublin to have a one wall kitchen that looks like a fancy Georgian bookcase.
my only question is how are you going to hide the electrics for the induction cooktop? It’d be a shame to ruin the beautiful leg sight lines on the piano.
May 23, 2018 @ 12:07 pm
I wouldn’t worry so much about bacon as group 1 carcinogen as much as I’d worry about EMF emitted from your induction or any other fumes from whatever you cook that will go in your lungs which Are also carcinogenic. So don’t let me stop you sounds like you know everything about nothing .
May 23, 2018 @ 4:05 pm
Several of us are curious about where the power for the stove top will run through the piano. I would love to hear your creative solution.
May 23, 2018 @ 9:26 pm
I can’t wait to see the movie! I’ve been a vegan for over 6 years and I’m extremely healthy! I just have to laugh when people ask me the same question (about protein) and if “it’s healthy not eating meat?” The people that ask are usually the ones that are chowing down on a steady diet of McDonald’s and KFC. 🙂
May 28, 2018 @ 12:46 am
The mirror will not be centered on the island and that is the only thing I can’t get behind on this plan.
May 29, 2018 @ 11:03 am
I lived in Hawaii for 9 yrs. you won’t be taking any mirrors there!! Love your kitchen!! You are so right about pharmaceutical co and health care. Plant combos for protein are as old as…… beans and rice anyone?? Carry on!!
June 4, 2018 @ 8:19 pm
This illustrates an idea someone else suggested. Remove the mirror, build a 9″ or so box the same size as the frame, & use the mirror to line the box. Insert brass shelf pegs into holes drilled into the sides of the box, & install glass shelves for display. The mirror will not only reflect the room, but also add panache to items stored on the shelves. I would use it to display antique china, crystal, & silverplate, but it would look amazing with anything! https://www.facebook.com/chicandantique/photos/a.627014444035104.1073741828.626997037370178/1689391174464087/?type=3&theater
June 7, 2018 @ 6:14 pm
My favourite (pretend) responses to “where do you get your protein?” are: “from where your protein gets its protein”, and “from the grocery store”. Not that I would actually say either of those things to anyone in those words, but I amuse myself by thinking about them.
Anyway, I found you via your hood fan post (hear hear!). And now this fantastic post on your fabulous mirror AND veganing!?
You are my spirit animal. That is all.