When I met you, it was love at first sight.
You were so buff and tawny and easygoing.
You looked just like Channing Tatum.
You held my hand and whispered encouragement. You took me to the beach for sunset picnics and told me you’d never met anyone so funny.
You stroked my hair, and my ego, and told me that I bore a strong resemblance to Audrey Hepburn. And I when I said, no actually… I think I look more like Elizabeth Taylor? You agreed so quickly.
I spent all my free time with you, WordPress.Com. I thought about you constantly… And then you gave me the blog-equivalent of an engagement ring: you featured me.
I swore my everlasting devotion and fidelity.
I ran around addled… high on blog-crack and screaming nonsense at my husband. Actually FRIGHTENING him— by charging into the kitchen and screaming—THEY PICKED ME AGAIN.
Note: I doctored this screen shot to put my blog first, under the Freshly Pressed heading. Both for space purposes AND because that’s where it belongs.
Wow. This is totally fascinating… keep reading.