In mid-April, I will have been blogging for an entire year…
An entire year of staring at my computer and thinking of YOU.
My readers.
You strangers…
Everyday, all the time… thinking how I can entertain you.
Thinking of how I can make sure you NEVER LEAVE ME.
And? Frankly?
That’s been pretty exhausting.
I had planned for the one-year mark to be the point at which I could STOP thinking about you… And instead, think about the fact that now I was famous.
Yet another plan, gone awry.
Wow… it’s been a while, eh? Where have I been?
I’ve been bending time and space with my mind.
Yes… I’m exhausted, thanks for asking.
Moving this blog only took me twenty-seven times longer than I thought it would.
The amount of time. And energy. And thought… that I’ve spent on details like my social-media icons? Has been appropriate for full-scale nuclear warfare. Or what to wear to a high-school reunion.
Those icons? Down below, in the sidebar? I picked them for YOU–you people who read my blog. Because I love you.
You’re ALL I think about.
It took me roughly 97 hours to get them to line up and have an orange border.
So I REALLY hope you like them.
Dear WordPress.com,
When I met you, it was love at first sight.
You were so buff and tawny and easygoing.
You looked just like Channing Tatum.
You held my hand and whispered encouragement. You took me to the beach for sunset picnics and told me you’d never met anyone so funny.
You stroked my hair, and my ego, and told me that I bore a strong resemblance to Audrey Hepburn. And I when I said, no actually… I think I look more like Elizabeth Taylor? You agreed so quickly.
I spent all my free time with you, WordPress.Com. I thought about you constantly… And then you gave me the blog-equivalent of an engagement ring: you featured me.
I swore my everlasting devotion and fidelity.
I ran around addled… high on blog-crack and screaming nonsense at my husband. Actually FRIGHTENING him— by charging into the kitchen and screaming—THEY PICKED ME AGAIN.
Note: I doctored this screen shot to put my blog first, under the Freshly Pressed heading. Both for space purposes AND because that’s where it belongs.
Hey there! If you’re here for the sparkly stuff? Welcome!
This blog is TOTALLY ALL ABOUT SPARKLY STUFF.
If you’re here for my mind-bogglingly amazing writing skills? Also, welcome.
I don’t break them out as often as the disco balls, but when I do, it’s fantastic.
My cheap mirror ball source.
When we moved here, all of a sudden I was tasked with juggling the design of renovating an entire house.
Which, objectively? Does not seem that hard… It already had walls and floors and rooms. So what is there to really design?
I love Halloween like other people love Valentine’s Day. Or their Birthday. Or any day when people give you gifts and profess undying love.
I love Halloween because you get to wear costumes. Fake hair. Fake eyelashes. Fake glasses. Fake teeth. Sparkles, tulle, cowboy hats, crowns, hoop skirts, eye-patches, alien heads… whatever.
So when I found out there was a WordPress blogging camp in Philadelphia? AND it was Halloween themed? I absolutely planned to wear a costume.
Because costumes are awesome.
Back in September, I wrote a post about my best friend and me. I told the story of how, in our early twenties, we packed up her car and moved to Texas.
It is by far, my favorite post… but I had anxiety it might fall flat:
But then magic happened. It’s the only scientific explanation.
I felt like Lady Gaga. Like I’d sold out Wembley Stadium. Like I was Kate Middleton— and people were screaming my name and sending me free clothes and begging to do my hair.
